Interracial Dating in China is Not Just for White Men | Speaking of China

112 Responses

  1. MyTwoCents
    MyTwoCents October 5, 2012 at 2:47 am | | Reply

    Hate mails? Wow. I didn’t know that. I hope they’re coming from just a handful of white guys. I guess to them white women dating asian men would be dating down and it’s not something they can cope with. I wonder if they have the same hatred toward white women dating black men. Times have changed. Maybe these white guys should see this video of an asian-american guy making out with an austrailian woman.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNJ9qi7-qCY

  2. jenna cody
    jenna cody October 5, 2012 at 3:28 am | | Reply

    I think I know that guy. If it’s the same guy, he comments on my blog, too, and I don’t publish his bile.

    Does he link to some really repugnant website about “boycotting American women”? And say things like “American men marrying Chinese women is about 20,000 per year. American women marrying Chinese men is about 20 per year. These numbers are not accurate but they are more accurate than what feminists print”? Or “American women are fat, unchaste, don’t cook or clean, are loud and ugly, which is why American men are dating Foreign Women”?

    (Real things that somebody said on the Internet)

    If so…yes, it’s that guy. He’s stalked more than one blog by a foreign woman writing about Asia.

  3. SBC
    SBC October 5, 2012 at 4:53 am | | Reply

    Sorry to hear there are douche’s out there. I think all races have them. I encountered them in more than one color when I first started dating my bf too… And as one friend rightly said… F%$k the haters. Live your life and believe in your choices. I suppose some people need to find a better hobby, and the idea of dictating who should date whom is a bit ridiculous.

    I love that picture btw… Daniel Henney is tragically hot, and an awesome example of a uber macho asian male… Asian or not… he is drool worthy. haha.

    You have my support Jocelyn. Keep writing your amazing blog. Who cares about the haters?

  4. ordinary malaysian
    ordinary malaysian October 5, 2012 at 5:19 am | | Reply

    Some people (many?) are still stuck evolutionarily speaking, if you will excuse the word. Ha ha

  5. dingjie
    dingjie October 5, 2012 at 6:29 am | | Reply

    2011 Shanghai transnational marriage registration

    Chinese man30% Chinese woman70%
    Chinesewoman and foreign man TOP5
    1 Japan
    2 South Korea
    3 USA
    4 Canada
    5 Britain
    Chinese men and foreign women TOP5
    1 Japan
    2 South Korea
    3 Russia
    4 Vietnam
    5 USA

    2005 Chinese man Only 7%

    I think the 2020 Chinese man should have 55%
    Shanghai transnational marriage registration

  6. askdsk
    askdsk October 5, 2012 at 7:01 am | | Reply

    Let’s call it an internet freedom of speech. He can write nasty comments, and we can all him idiot and worse.
    Racist has character flaw. I don’t think a racist will treat their women well either. That is why their own people turn against them eventually.
    Asians are doing a little better on the screen in recent years. The more you see some Asian dude kisses other girls on the screen, the more people can get comfortable. I think other interracial couples go through the same process. Not just Asians.
    Look how conservative media these days pull s* out of their asses about Obama because he is black (half anyway).

  7. Sveta
    Sveta October 5, 2012 at 7:49 am | | Reply

    Sorry that there’s a jerk who’s posting hateful comments about AM/WF dating. Does he honestly think if he posts negative comments then that will make himself look better? My 27th birthday is today Definitely not looking forward to the day. 🙁 Be strong and good luck.

  8. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 5, 2012 at 9:38 am | | Reply

    Haters are mostly psychopaths whose happiness is based on manipulation and hurting of others.
    Check psycopath test list
    http://www.arkancide.com/psychopathy.htm

    Most racist haters fit the profile well.

  9. naomi
    naomi October 5, 2012 at 9:56 am | | Reply

    Having haters posting on your blog, I think, shows that you are saying something that needs to be said. So keep it up!

  10. Bruce
    Bruce October 5, 2012 at 10:44 am | | Reply

    First of all, this guy has agenda already when he sends those emails. There are lots of white women marrying asian men out there. I saw more couples am/wf yesterday with kids running around. I know that there ‘s only a few asian males here including me and I think that’s good . It’s better for a western woman says one word here than 10 words by an asian man. This is what western women want and they can not be suppressed anymore. THE MORE YOU TALK ABOUT THE ISSUE , THE MORE COMFORTIBLE PEOPLE ARE! Look around you please mostly wm/aw. What finds attractive to wm in asian women can be applied to wwam also. There are plenty of western women out there who find asian men very attractive but people just don’t talk about. NOW IT’S TIME TO TALK ABOUT IT. Nobody here is running away from anything or anybody ! You mean if I walk out the door, western women don’t find me attractive. Of course, some will love to know me. I’m married and I can’t say much here. Why am I here all the time? why???? Tell me why?? Do you think I don’t have enough problems and issues and attention outside this blog? I’m here is to show SUPPORT and that is my only reason here. If I don’t like something or you, even you give me a million dollars or invite me here. I don’t even want to be here. This is the real me… A person with substance!

  11. AG
    AG October 5, 2012 at 3:55 pm | | Reply

    http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzg1NTkyMTU2.html
    Check out at 5:00. and 50:40 of the video.

    In this popular Chinese dating show, quite a few beautiful white women are looking for Chinese or Asian men specifically. On the other hand, Chinese guys interested in white women in China are still minoriy. Fear of leaving China is big deal.

    Jocelyn successfully took her husband out of China. 成功!

    懂中文的可以帮助翻译,让大家欣赏。我今天实在是太忙。多谢了。

  12. Manny
    Manny October 5, 2012 at 4:12 pm | | Reply

    Hi Jocelyn, I am sorry to read that one of my fellow White boys wrote such terrible things to you. I think you are one of the greatest persons in the world for bringing out the issue of interracial dating between Chinese men and Western women. Did he only vilifiy interracial dating between Asian men and Western women? What did he say about dating between Western men and Chinese/Asian women? I bet he did not object to White men going with an Asian woman. Am I correct?

  13. Manny
    Manny October 5, 2012 at 5:31 pm | | Reply

    @AG. Jocelyn is the BEST!

  14. askdsk
    askdsk October 5, 2012 at 6:15 pm | | Reply

    @AG
    Those are TV shows – shows to get people to watch.

  15. Samantha
    Samantha October 5, 2012 at 7:39 pm | | Reply

    YES! Yes yes yes. Yes to all of the things you just said.

  16. zhao
    zhao October 5, 2012 at 7:52 pm | | Reply

    Just like the person , not only white males, some chinese males are too.when they these white or chinse male saw chinese female dating white male or chinese male dating white female, these guys’s mouth always cannot shut up.I think these guys said these words , That is for protecting self chance or envy those guys. So, ignore them just fine. dont keep it in mind.

  17. Bruce
    Bruce October 5, 2012 at 9:41 pm | | Reply

    Manny,

    “bet he did not object to White men going with an Asian woman. Am I correct?” You are absolutely correct. See normally you won’t see a chinese /asian sending emails like that because we really don’t have that kind of time and mindset. Manny, when you said that you love chinese goddesses, did I send you hate emails? I not only helped you but I also supported you. You will not meet people like me in real life often.

  18. cvaguy
    cvaguy October 5, 2012 at 10:06 pm | | Reply

    It may be better to have one hater who repeated his posts than have many different haters, given haters exist for just about any blog.

  19. Bruce
    Bruce October 5, 2012 at 10:12 pm | | Reply

    @Jocelyn,

    You are moving in the right direction.When I look at your blog, you purposely link other blogs to yours. This proves to me that you are a very giving and sharing person . You’re very dedicated . This what we are attracted to and keep on coming here.

  20. C.
    C. October 5, 2012 at 10:17 pm | | Reply

    My free advice: Log his comments with their IP address. If this guy escallates, you’ll need to have that on hand to give to the cops. There’s more at Shakesville and Pandagon about what to do, but people like him can get really violent IRL, especially if they know your real name.

    As an aside, if he is the one talking about “boycotting white women,” all I have to say is this: good riddance! (I do feel sorry for the Asian woman who gets stuck with his racsexist a**, though.)

  21. Alex
    Alex October 5, 2012 at 10:30 pm | | Reply

    What a pathetic bloke. He thinks that white women are white man’s property. Just ignore him. He’s not worth your time Jocelyn.

  22. Maree
    Maree October 6, 2012 at 3:34 am | | Reply

    That guy should get a life, times have changed! Haters can hate all they want. Reminds me of this girl at my work who claims that I have to have an Asian fetish in order for me to be dating one. I LOL’d so hard….i asked and if it was a white guy I was dating? her response “no then that’s not a fetish because it’s not weird”….I’m a mixed girl btw. Some people seriously have some outdated attitudes going on when it comes to Asian men or interracial dating in general.

  23. Julie
    Julie October 6, 2012 at 8:07 am | | Reply

    Amen!!

  24. MKL
    MKL October 6, 2012 at 11:25 am | | Reply

    The person Jenna described also commented on my log and I have deleted him – and I’m a guy. My post was about white guys on Taiwanese girls. I’ve deleted him immediately, but it seems he’s lurking around the Asia-related blogs. He’s clearly retarded.

  25. David
    David October 6, 2012 at 1:45 pm | | Reply

    dingjie:
    Good to see that despite traditional hatred between the Chinese and Japanese, they are inter-marrying in large numbers.

  26. David
    David October 6, 2012 at 2:08 pm | | Reply

    “Manny, when you said that you love chinese goddesses, did I send you hate emails? I not only helped you but I also supported you. You will not meet people like me in real life often.”

    Bruce:
    That is why someone like Manny will encounter no problems when he goes after a Chinese woman in Hong Kong. But, try the reverse. Let evena a Chinese ethnic millionaire male or any Asian man try to do the same thing with white women even in Tuscaloosa, AL or Athens, GA, he may not even live to write about it. Back in 2009, a young white V’ball coach (I was actually present during her birth in 1983 giving support to her father who is now a coach at a Top 20 V’ball program in the country) was seeing a Japanese auto exec in a southern state where she was an assistant coach. She took a break and went back home. She talked to her significant other on the phone two days before she returned. He seemed rather depressed and would not tell her or her dad the reason. She called him again and no answer. Very worried she and her dad drove back south and went straight to his home fearing the worst. The worst did not happen. The house was cleaned out and the neighbor told them that he had moved back to Japan. The auto company was facing too much pressure from the local whites over the IR. It literally moved him back to Japan. Yes, they told him, he gets a promotion if he moved back otherwise he is fired. And his style was not like that of Manny.

    There are white American men I know who would not date white women who dated Asian or other non-white men. I probably know equal number of white American women who wont date white men who dated Asian or other non-white women. But, mostly it is white men who date Asian women who dont want white women dating Asian men. I have not found any white woman yet from any country who date Asian men but dont want white men dating Asian men. However, white women dating Asian men are pretty much confined to this blog or the AMWW magazine.

    This site is pretty civilized to tell you the truth. However, it all comes down to greed. I want yours (Asian women) but you cannot have mine (white women), granted slaver was abolished 150 years ago here in the US and white men do not own white women or vice versa, although majority white people here think along those lines. I know Singaporeans, white Aussies and white Brits who love living and working abroad on fat salaries and expat benefits. However, talk to them in Asia or elsewhere they dont like reciprocating. It is a one way street as far as they are concerned. Most Singaporeans are the worst culprits in this regard. Similarly many white American men when it comes to dating.

  27. David
    David October 6, 2012 at 2:16 pm | | Reply

    One more thing: Many like to blame Hollywood. Actually Hollywood does not even want to show Asian-Asian romance. One Asian partner, the woman who was a romantic interest of an Asian male in Hawaii Five O was killed off in the show. Actually black male-Asian female couples were shown more often than Asian-Asian or black-black couples in the Prime Time TV shows in the mid 2000s. Grey’s Anatomy’s Bruce and Christina come to mind. They were around for a long time. But, hate caught up to them. Due to ratings drop and Bruce making some comments in public, the couple literally disappeared. Then they tried it with an Indian woman and white man in the Comedy Big Bang Theory…Hate finally caught up to them and she was dropped. Now they are trying it out with the Good Wife…dont know how long that will last. Probably until the end of December.

  28. MKL
    MKL October 6, 2012 at 2:25 pm | | Reply

    @David: I don’t think it’s fair to connect an interracial romance in a TV drama with a drop of the ratings caused by a disapproval of such relationships. Some shows just start to suck after a while and ratings fall. Unless you have a research that backs up your claims, I don’t see any reason to go into such debate here. At least you see interracial love on US TV… How much do you see it in dramas in China, Korea, Japan?

  29. HAMLover
    HAMLover October 6, 2012 at 9:01 pm | | Reply

    @ Jenna Cody…That creep was writing crap on my blog too. I used to have comments open but now I moderate them all. His blog is so dodgy as he apparently has all these people who “email” him but he has no means of being contacted. There have also been others who have called me a whore, slut etc. It turned me off blogging a little. There a lot of trolls out there.

  30. MyTwoCents
    MyTwoCents October 7, 2012 at 12:33 am | | Reply

    @David, MKL: Never underestimate the power of the media. There is a reason why companies pay millions of dollars to put up their ads on TV. There is a reason why we all wear Nike shoes and not Reebok or Asics. Even today we hardly ever see an Asian guy in a positive light in any movies or TV shows. I can think of a few like “The Walking Dead” and “Harold and Kumar”. I just saw Seinfeld a few days ago about an Asian guy getting hit in a traffic incident and is planning to sue. The Asian guy is a lowly Chinese food delivery boy who speaks broken English. He gets help from his cousin who is an attractive attorney and speaks fluent English. Guess what? The same old theme: she ends up falling in love with a white guy. Besides the media, I think we Asians are not well liked to begin with. I live in a growing city near San Francisco where middle class Asian Americans are buying up new homes in the city. Somebody doesn’t like it because there is a sign on the road that says “Stop the Asian Invasion”.

    http://www.arounddublinblog.com/2009/11/dublin-deals-with-racial-tension-as-city-continues-to-grow

    Chinese food delivery boy? I’m an electronics engineer. I have a 6-figure salary and own a brand new house.

  31. askdsk
    askdsk October 7, 2012 at 8:34 am | | Reply

    It is true Asians only played stereotypical roles in the past. Things change because media is becoming more international for business reasons. Anytime you have a critical mass to challenge the status quo, you will have to deal with haters.
    Another show would be “The Mentalist” to feature Asian main character.
    Asian parents need to let their kids get out of those “safe” careers and into politics and entertainment.

  32. Bruce
    Bruce October 7, 2012 at 12:20 pm | | Reply

    This “Roger” is everywhere. Ignore him! I saw him everywhere. You have to have a sick mind and you must hate yourself and people in order to last this long. Ignore him okay. I might kick his ass in person if he say something to me.

  33. David
    David October 7, 2012 at 10:26 pm | | Reply

    My Two Cents:
    You are preaching to the converted. I trust you were replying to MKL.
    “Somebody doesn’t like it because there is a sign on the road that says “Stop the Asian Invasion”.”
    Same thing in Huntington Beach, CA. If the folks there had not run up debt and gotten into a crisis, they would not have to sell the homes to not just Asians but also Asian Americans. Every action has its consequences, positive or negative.
    “Another show would be “The Mentalist” to feature Asian main character.”
    All true. However, as you may note from last year, his character was in love with a white woman. They kissed, ratings well and four episodes down the road, she was history. They dont like Asian-white couples in Hollywood (Mentalist and Big Bang Theory), heck they dont even like Asian-Asian couples (Hawaii Five 0). The only inter-racial couple they seem to like is the Asian woman-black male couples. In Grey’s Anatomy it lasted for two years.
    I stand by my statement that an Asian male cannot do even in college towns such as Athens, GA or Tascaloosa, AL or for that matter even in Seattle, WA, what Manny did in HKG, ie., chase white women like manny chased Asian women in HKG and live to write about it. One can call it white privilege or one can call it history. I may offend many by saying this, but it is a fact. Many down there think like Rep. Hubbard of Arkansas and they are serious…for those who dont know what happened please check the news.

  34. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 11:06 am | | Reply

    I’d rather see someone made a dent on the ceiling rather than talking about the same thing. Ten years ago these characters do not exist.

  35. Katrina Miller-Fallick
    Katrina Miller-Fallick October 8, 2012 at 1:45 pm | | Reply

    “We’re not just biding our time in Beijing with a blanket, a stack of pirated DVDs and a quart of Haagen Dazs, waiting until the next moment when we board that plane back to London or New York City or Rio. More and more of us have opened our eyes and discovered some amazing men among the Sons of Han. ”

    Some of us have be lucky enough to not even have to leave home!

    Sorry about the haters. I agree. It means you are saying something important. 🙂

  36. David
    David October 8, 2012 at 1:54 pm | | Reply

    “I’d rather see someone made a dent on the ceiling rather than talking about the same thing. Ten years ago these characters do not exist.”
    Except it has not been possible to make a dent on the ceiling on this one issue of an Asian male doing with white females what Manny did with Asian females in HKG out in Athens, GA or elsewhere. Still better than how Indians males were treated in Australia, 2006-2009. In the south at least an Asian male has to mess with a white female to get into trouble, while in Australia, random Indian males got beaten up.

  37. Cvaguy
    Cvaguy October 8, 2012 at 4:11 pm | | Reply

    Just want to point out that things are getting better even it is not there yet. People don’t pay much attention to AMWW, well a little bit, in my area.

    I also saw quite a few AMWW in Williamsburge, VA even the local chinese restaurant had about 80% white dinners, 20% asians( vs more than 50% asians in my area). Very little black in the area which was very strang since historically it had more than 50% blacks.

  38. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 4:29 pm | | Reply

    @Cvaguy
    Williamsburg is a college town. That is why.
    US is also a big country. Your experience could be very different depending on where you live. I think Asians historically have done not so bad in the South. During segregation years, there were hardly no Asians living in the South. The very few assimilated quite well.
    I really don’t think David knows much about the situations in US.
    Asian men’ presence in US media has much broader impact. Every hit show here will go international with an improved image.

    How many people you know in the past have taken up acting career and play football? People all need role models. Most parents still want their kids to be engineers, lawyers and doctors where you can make a good living. Nothing wrong with that. But more doors need to be opened by someone.

  39. Manny
    Manny October 8, 2012 at 4:39 pm | | Reply

    @Bruce. You are truly a good person as you not only refused to condemn me for my having an Asian women preference/fetish, but you also supported me and helped me. For this, I am grateful. In fact, I do not even recall any stories of Asian men or Asian women propagating hate anywhere. The only hate literature which I have come to hear is from my fellow White boys in the U.S. In my home state in the U.S. (I do not want to give out my location), I live in a southern state which at one time had slavery and racial segregation, and I must say that the people here in general have changed a lot for the better. I have not heard of anyone who propagates hate among my circle of friends and relatives. I have only heard of racial jokes every now and then from my friends and family, but they are in no way racists. I think Jocelyn and you (Bruce) are truly great people.

  40. AG
    AG October 8, 2012 at 4:48 pm | | Reply

    @askdsk
    Yes, it is a reality show. But it is true people with real emotion. You can be in the show If you are looking, speaking Mandarin, not shy. The phone number is in the show. The hosts encourage people to apply
    http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMzg1NTkyMTU2.html

    @Manny
    Study mandarin and you can find your love on this show. And we all like to see you in the show:) You will be a great character on the show.

  41. AG
    AG October 8, 2012 at 5:09 pm | | Reply

    After reading this post and comments, my girlfriend and I made effort to count interracial couples when we visited Chicago yesterday.

    We encountered 4 interracial couples in the entire day. To our surprise, they are Asian male – White femal couples. We did not see a single white male/asian female couple at all. One mddie age couple with Asian husban runinng Chicago marathon while his wife and daughter were watching and cheering; One college age couples at movie theator watching `master’; One elder couples at Pf,Chang; One teenager couples smoking on the street while teenage girl staring at us since we are also AM/WF pair (lol).

    Certainly this might not be representative. But it is true image of Chicago. Yes, media might be biased. But media bias did not stop black males success with interracial relationship. It is all up to your own effort. You are a true winner when you can beat odd. Easy victory is less exciting.

  42. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 5:52 pm | | Reply

    @AG
    Reality shows are never reality. It is entertainment. These shows all follow certain formula. Some people could be on the show to tell less inflated version of life.
    Any China town will have many AMWW couples. It is not uncommon anymore. But we are not free from prejudices, and our choices are less.

  43. AG
    AG October 8, 2012 at 6:34 pm | | Reply

    @askdsk

    No, We did not visit China town.

  44. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 6:49 pm | | Reply

    @AG
    I wasn’t imply only China town has AMWW. University town also has more of them. Rare in general population though.

  45. AG
    AG October 8, 2012 at 8:53 pm | | Reply

    @askdsk
    Have you visited Chicago before?

  46. David
    David October 9, 2012 at 11:27 am | | Reply

    Json:
    Not talking about couples facing racism here. I was talking about Hollywood and the racial stereotypes that exist. To be honest with you last night’s episode of 2 broke girls which I was rather forced to see was outright racist, demeaning and disgusting and these stereotypes reinforce themselves. Second, is it possible for an Asian guy, even millionaire to come down south and chase white women like Manny went from the south to Hong Kong to look for Asian women? I am afraid not. If any Asian American did what Manny did in a town like even Tuscaloosa, AL, he will not get out alive…that is a fact! And as far as general racism is concerned, this blog has addressed the issue in the past. Even Jocelyn has faced some vicious racism in [State]!

  47. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 9:33 pm | | Reply

    @AG
    Yes. Their China town is really small. I meant to say AMWW are not so hard to find in certain places. Midwest has smaller Asian populations to begin with.

  48. askdsk
    askdsk October 8, 2012 at 9:49 pm | | Reply

    You can always find such couples around a big enough college too. I’ve been to Williamsburg.

  49. Terence
    Terence October 9, 2012 at 12:33 am | | Reply

    Sometimes I wonder if someone people can just let go? So why is it wrong for Asian men to be with colored women but white men can have anyone else? I’m attracted to White women but I still look for attitude and personality overall. If a Asian girl marries a white guy, good for them. If its a white girl that marries a Asian guy, then good for them. Simple as that.

  50. David
    David October 9, 2012 at 2:48 pm | | Reply

    “Come on, let’s face it!! not every place or state is racism.”

    Agreed! Yet to find real racist people in the Canadian Maritimes or in Manitoba. I have not met any racist in Seattle or Hawaii either. Hawaii is the only place where I have found lots of white female-Asian male couples. When I lived there for four months saw a different one almost every week. But, met plenty of racists in [State], some in Colorado and one state senator in Arkansas, even complained about the role of Asian women marrying white men and browning America! So, yes it varies from place to place as you say.

  51. David
    David October 9, 2012 at 8:54 am | | Reply

    “Sometimes I wonder if someone people can just let go?”

    Difficult to let go when there is no reciprocity. This is true of immigration policies, romance or any other stuff. I live pretty close to the US South…right on the border actually. The fact is the US South is not Hong Kong. Let us not delude ourselves. Countries get into trade wars when there is no reciprocity. As far as the shows are concerned, yes progress has been made, but it is essentially one step forward and two step backwards. Yesterday’s Two Broke Girls, (I was forced to watch it because I was at my sister’s house and she switched channels when the political ads came) was outright revolting and disgusting in its anti-Asian racism and stereotypes. The video should come up soon on the internet. Better to have no Asians on TV than Asians who are subject to such racist and degrading stereotypes. Disgusting really!

  52. Bruce
    Bruce October 9, 2012 at 9:16 am | | Reply

    @Manny,

    Are you sure I’m a great person? Maybe I just need your ” attention” or I’m an “attention whore” ( a person who needs attention constantly 🙂 . I love it!!! You know I’ve learned that it takes more energy to hate a person physically and emotionally. Maintaining a healthy relationship is the hardest. Getting a gf is easy but maintaining a peaceful, loving, understand relationship is not easy my friend.

    I’m calming down now while I do my daily tai chi near my pond. I hear the sound of birds and water flowing . Ahhhh the ultimate level of happiness :).

    Bruce 🙂

  53. Json
    Json October 9, 2012 at 10:01 am | | Reply

    @David

    You’re the only one who can’t let go. When I read your posts, we must be in two completely different worlds. I’ve never experienced any of the racism that you spout out. I don’t even think about that nonsense. I do whatever the hell I want. Just about any White, Black, Latina chick I’ve talked to have dated me. And I’ve never gotten any negative feedback from people. It’s all about how you carry yourself.

    Do other Asians face racism? Maybe. So what, they’re the ones who can’t find a way to break through it. You make your own experience in life. You can’t put the blame on other people and racism. All you ever post here is how Asian men are down, how Asian men are unlucky blah blah blah. You probably go around looking for that nonsense everyday. You need to stop that nonsense. It’s pathetic.

  54. Json
    Json October 9, 2012 at 10:11 am | | Reply

    @AG

    “You are a true winner when you can beat odd. Easy victory is less exciting.”

    Dating a White, Black, whatever female isn’t any harder than dating an Asian female.

    There’s no beating the odds. It’s two people being in a relationship, that’s all it is.

  55. askdsk
    askdsk October 9, 2012 at 12:14 pm | | Reply

    Maybe the first time is more like a conquest. I get the sentiment when it comes to dating whites. Because such coupling is relatively rare, it can be like winning a prize, especially in Asia. But nobody should act out of proportions to maintain such relationships. Not worth it in the long run.

    @David
    It is possible some Asian guy chases random girls in the South as long as he knows what he is doing. I don’t think Manny will act foolish in a foreign land either.

  56. Bruce
    Bruce October 9, 2012 at 1:11 pm | | Reply

    You know always think positive. If you stick around with negative people , you will be negative yourself!!!!!!!!!!!! I always hang around with positive people and I always want to create a happy, stress free envirnoment. I think positive and I make people think positive. If you face racism as an IR couple, then fight back or move out.. Come on, let’s face it!! not every place or state is racism. My neighbors are whites and they like me. Yes it is true how you carry yourself.

  57. Bruce
    Bruce October 9, 2012 at 1:16 pm | | Reply

    Sorry about some of my sentences that don’t make sense due to misspelled words etc. I’m working (talking to clients ) while making comments so my fingers don’t align with my thoughts.

    Bruce

  58. David
    David October 9, 2012 at 2:42 pm | | Reply

    “It is possible some Asian guy chases random girls in the South as long as he knows what he is doing. I don’t think Manny will act foolish in a foreign land either.”

    Possible, but definitely rare. I have seen blogs of white American men and their conquest in Asia without much problems but not the reverse. However, unlike Manny he will be careful and wont write about it. Most likely it will be an Asian American and not born in Asia.

  59. Asdf
    Asdf October 9, 2012 at 3:41 pm | | Reply

    Don’t validate the trolls by dedicating a post to him! If no one gives him any attention, if no one responds to him, if no one reads him, would he even exist? I didn’t know he existed until you made this post

  60. Bruce
    Bruce October 9, 2012 at 4:17 pm | | Reply

    Different fish eats different baits just like women 🙂

  61. askdsk
    askdsk October 9, 2012 at 7:33 pm | | Reply

    @ David
    Your problem is having trouble to get laid. That has messed up your brain.

  62. Bruce
    Bruce October 9, 2012 at 8:13 pm | | Reply

    To be honest, Manny can be red, white or blue and I still help him. I just let to help people in general and I don’t ask for anything back in return. Do you know if I’m a single chinese man again, I can create a blog about women conquest in the west? I just don’t have this kind of mindset for this kind of GAME. i really didn’t have this kind of interest. I didn’t expect a white man to help me get a white woman anyway. Just be yourself and gladly women can’t resist you IF you make the right moves.

    Have fun fighting over nonsense :).

    Bruce

  63. AG
    AG October 9, 2012 at 9:00 pm | | Reply

    http://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/article.cfm?articleid=3079

    This study show even educated people exhibit racial bias. White males are most favored by all fields except fine arts. Blacks do relative good compared to other minorities (due to awareness?). Certainly racism against black recieves much public comdemnation due to historical reason. Chinese woimen recieves the worst treatment.

    The educators in research are not all white. Some minority also display racial bias against its own race. The cause might be multitudes including media, history, self-hate, cultural background, ect.
    Jocylen’s husband might have some similar experience.

  64. askdsk
    askdsk October 9, 2012 at 9:45 pm | | Reply

    Another study uses native speakers from different races- white and Asian- to read the same thing. People complain the Asian person is harder to understand. These prejudices play out subtly. Being in a interracial relationship will open your eyes to new perspectives like an insider sometimes. Some people change with new level of awareness. One of my favorite thing is to debate white previlidge. Majority of the population will deny it existence in post civil right era.
    Another myth is the pay gap. Asians are perceived to have highest earnings on average. Not true. Whites always perform better given the same background and position.

    I do not think it is healthy to ignore these factors in relationships. But it is not something to carry on your back. Play the cards you are dealt bravely.

    @ Bruce
    As far as I can see, David is one of many people with victim mindsets. You only like to feed people what you think they want to hear.

  65. David
    David October 10, 2012 at 7:21 am | | Reply

    “One of my favorite thing is to debate white previlidge. Majority of the population will deny it existence in post civil right era.”

    Yep. A white American male looking for Asian women in Hong Kong. But, an Asian guy will be sanctioned or attacked if he tries the same in Athens, GA…nope nothing to do with me getting laid. I am over 50 now, been there done that! Not a victim mindset, just stating facts.

    “Another myth is the pay gap. Asians are perceived to have highest earnings on average. Not true. Whites always perform better given the same background and position.”

    Asian-white couples have on average the highest incomes in the US. If there was no discriminatiion their income would be a lot higher. Years before the Texaco lawsuit, Roberts Vs Texaco, a young white woman with the last name Lee was working for that racist corporation. Her Chinese-American husband lived in CA with the kids. The ignorant whites in Texaco thought her husband was descended from Robert E Lee instead of Bruce Lee. They were very nice to her until three years later her husband visited Texas and someone saw them together in the street. Things started going downhill from there. She was harrassed, demoted and finally forced to leave the corporation. The year was 1989 and she was only white plaintiff in Roberts Vs Texaco.

  66. David
    David October 10, 2012 at 8:55 am | | Reply
  67. Bruce
    Bruce October 10, 2012 at 9:33 am | | Reply

    Racism will always exist. We have to move forward. If we always keeps on talking about the past, then we will never move to the future. Yes we have to struggle through racism but people or other races are currently learning about us ;therefore, the situation has improved. I try to smile and be happy every single day even though there are racism and discrimination 5 ft away from me. Let’s move forward.

    Good luck,

    Bruce

  68. Manny
    Manny October 10, 2012 at 11:15 am | | Reply

    @Bruce, keep up the positivism, bro. You are good.

  69. askdsk
    askdsk October 10, 2012 at 12:58 pm | | Reply

    Some of us don’t talk about these out of resentments. We want to be better leaders.
    Bruce, I’d be surprised you have confronted racism in your real life. Being in a interracial relationship gives you plenty of opportunities.

  70. Bruce
    Bruce October 10, 2012 at 2:23 pm | | Reply

    @askdsf,

    Of course, I’ve confronted racism!! Wherever you or I walk , there is racism. It’s how you interpret discrimination. You have to release yourself from always being a victim. Don’t be surprise because racism can be subtle ( direct or indirect). I just don’t give a damn about it. In my subconcious mind, I wanted to use deadly force to take care of problems BUT I always told myself to cool down to find other alternative ways. There is a limit/boundary where you can only push a person so far before he goes crazy.

    @ Manny,

    We are allies now ! 🙂 That’s why I have so many friends. The question is will I want to be his/her friend :). I’m always learning to avoid people who will take advantage of me. I’m smart and a smart ass also so very difficult to cheat me :).

  71. askdsk
    askdsk October 10, 2012 at 2:53 pm | | Reply

    @Bruce
    I am sure you are even bigger in real life.

    Anybody watched “Shanghai Calling”? What do you think about the movie?

  72. Bruce
    Bruce October 10, 2012 at 3:42 pm | | Reply

    askdsk,

    You mean my height and weight or social status/circle of friends? I’m 6’1″ 210lbs. I’m no fat ass :). I do bodybuilding 4 to 5 times a week. I have 4 to 5 hobbies ongoing yr round activities. I’m posing right now in front of the mirrow showing my triceps. OMG, askdsk! my triceps look like a horseshoe shape. I love it :).

    My philosophy is free yourself from stress ( victim of racism , nonsense etc). Release yourself from bad memories. Life is very short to stress out or worry about something that will age us and give us physical and mental illness. People just can relate to you once you open up and they are attracted to you as a person. Racism will diminish a little when you capture their heart. If you can make a person comfortible with you, then everything is okay.

  73. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 11, 2012 at 9:35 am | | Reply

    Yes, there is racism in USA. But it should not stop you. I did date quite a few `racist’ white women before. They are mostly politically conservative with prejudice against minorities including Chinese. They are not haters, but enough racial bias. Truth is that I get more dates from `racist’ women than so called `liberal’ women though I am poltically central-left. At least these `racist’ women treated me as individual, not just another Chinese. They do not generalize at individual level.

    One of my ex is very open about her white superiority. We got into a lot arguement over racial issue. But she always said : What I love is a person not his race. Beside poltics, we got along really fine.

  74. askdsk
    askdsk October 11, 2012 at 11:07 am | | Reply

    @aiyangxifu
    Pretty much true to the reality. I’d rather have a honest discussion than being political correct.
    I want other people see me as a flawed person rather than selling my heritage. Over compensating is lack of confidence.

    “Shanghai Calling” for the most part is a bad movie. It is trying to appeal to both English and Chinese audience, but does not really do both.

  75. David
    David October 11, 2012 at 1:51 pm | | Reply

    “Yes, there is racism in USA. But it should not stop you. I did date quite a few `racist’ white women before. They are mostly politically conservative with prejudice against minorities including Chinese. They are not haters, but enough racial bias. Truth is that I get more dates from `racist’ women than so called `liberal’ women though I am poltically central-left. At least these `racist’ women treated me as individual, not just another Chinese. They do not generalize at individual level.

    One of my ex is very open about her white superiority. We got into a lot arguement over racial issue. But she always said : What I love is a person not his race. Beside poltics, we got along really fine.”

    I have met Obama supporters who wont sit next to a minority in a bus, and draw the line at interracial dating marriage. I have never heard of what you have said before. It is a little bit surprising that someone who would date an Asian has white supremacy issues. You are joking right?

  76. Bruce
    Bruce October 11, 2012 at 2:16 pm | | Reply

    David,

    It’s hard to tell all whites ,etc to like minority ( chinese etc). We have to live our own lives and we don’t need approval from others in order to succeed in whatever we’re pursuing either in an IR or a business.

    You know alot of people in the past had cheated me in many transactions . I don’t even think about what has happened or how much money I’ve lost. I only think about the future and how to make it better and avoid any problems again. That’s why we have laws, news and lawsuits. We’re learning from each case and make it better. I know a few people here that always talk about the past and they can’t let go of the past. It’s not healthy to remember bad experiences or history. I hope you are not one of the people I talk about. We have to open the door for others to enter. If we shut the door 24/7, how are we going to communicate and understand each other. This is my metaphor.

  77. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 11, 2012 at 2:20 pm | | Reply

    @David
    “You are joking right?” Not a joke. She is from upper middle class / wealthy class family similar to Romney, with conservative Republican background. She is quite intelligent with strong opinion and political believe. When I took her traveling in China and other part of world, her negative remarks about other cultures really irritated me. So I kept asking her why do you date me then if you think western culture so superior. You get those answers on above post. She is also an activist in Republican party. She believe the whole world should learn from West and adopt Western culture.

    Her parents even have worse opinion about minorities. They think liberal poltics would destroy the world.

  78. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 11, 2012 at 2:27 pm | | Reply

    @David
    My ex is a neo-conservative like George Bush. BTW, have you dated white women before?

  79. askdsk
    askdsk October 11, 2012 at 2:59 pm | | Reply

    “She believe the whole world should learn from West and adopt Western culture.”

    Learn, yes; adopt, no. Her sense of entitlement is understandable.
    Conservatives have valid points. Liberals call too many people racists. Nobody should play victims too much. People all talk shit to get votes.
    David, you ever met white women telling you nobody sitting by them in China on the bus? Probably not.

  80. Laura
    Laura October 11, 2012 at 7:01 pm | | Reply

    Interracial Dating is still a difficult topic for some people.
    Sometimes I think is not only because of the way they were educated, but also because they are “afraid” of something. I sometimes think that those who don’t like and talk about others relationships like that are just showing a lack of confidence.
    I recently faced a very weird situation with a friend of my boyfriend. His friend needed a place to stay during 1 week and he asked if he could stay with us.
    He arrived, took a shower and then he saw me, he knew my boyfriend and me were living together but maybe he thought I would not be there..or hide somewhere..?..After insisting a lot we went out for lunch, we talked, and during all the time I felt he was not comfortable.
    At some point my boyfriend said: maybe in 1 year when you come back from US you come with a foreign girlfriend!( he was just trying to find a funny coincidence)..
    Suddenly he said: “No, Never.”
    There was silent, I didn’t say anything and he continued;”I would never have a foreign girlfriend and I don’t understand how is it possible you both are together, you are too different”.
    Well then I needed to say something…: ” If too people need to be the same to be together then is like saying you love yourself so you need to date someone that is like you, Is nice when two people complement each other”.
    We did’t talk about it anymore. He went to do some stuff..and in the evening I said to my boyfriend ” I am sure he won’t come for dinner, he will text and say he found a friend and will dinner with him”, that was exactly what happened.
    Next morning he was taking part of his belongings and deciding that he wanted to spend 1 day in another town. Ok..
    That they passed, my boyfriend called me and said: ” He called me and he will go home to leave some papers so please be home at this time!”, I did!
    He came home..and instead of “leaving something” he picked up all his stuff and said: “Thank you for hosting me.”
    I said: ” You are leaving? You won’t come again?” .
    Answer: ” No”.
    My boyfriend arrived home with all the food for a nice dinner for 3, I don’t know what he was thinking when he came to the apartment but he knew we were living together, and since I live there I am not going to rent a room in a hotel to let him stay there when there is one room for guests..
    Anyway..I felt bad, said to my boyfriend that I am sorry..and once again he said..: I think he is not the same person I met when we studied together.

  81. askdsk
    askdsk October 11, 2012 at 7:33 pm | | Reply

    I don’t think you need to apologize for anything. It will happen again in the future. It will be nice if your boyfriend can recognize that.
    Some people are ignorant. Your boyfriend will lose friends. I did, and I learned not to care. You can always make new friends with all kinds of people.
    We talked a lot about prejudices in US or other places. I still think it is harder to be mixed couple in China. Social pressure can be quite high due to how the society functions. Most western countries recognize diversity and multiculturalism. Sometimes individualism can really play to your advantage. It is really not that big of a deal after a while.

  82. Bruce
    Bruce October 11, 2012 at 8:31 pm | | Reply

    Friends suppose to support each other NO MATTER WHAT HAPPEN! I told you guys here so many times that these people are NOT friends. They are acquaintances ( not true friends). Define the meaning of friendship to me here and I will explain the real meaning. To me friendship means that a person/ group of people who will be there for me when I’m at my lowest moment. He will give me support while I’m making my millions or building an empire!!!!!!!!! Once you break this trust or push me down, you are no longer my friends anymore. ” I may be young but my knowledge of life has surpassed everyone”

    Bruce

  83. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 12:26 pm | | Reply

    “But it is getting better overall for Asians.”
    Mostly agree. Outside of dating and roles in Hollywood this is true but that is not due to people having a sudden change in heart like the change of heart show of the early 2000s! It is because whites are becoming a minority pretty soon and if we can get the Puerto Ricans to move to the mainland in large numbers and get the Virgin Islanders and Samoans to move as well, we will achieve the goal faster even with a decrease in immigration. Three states plus DC are already majority minority.
    Mei-Lee Chai wrote about how her family was harrassed in some town in South Dakota and Frank Wu wrote about how white parents did not want him playing with white boys…mind you white boys back in the 1960s. That sort of thing will not happen again and does not even happen in anti-Asian enclaves south of Denver or in [State] or eastern Washington state and for that matter down southj. However, will we continue to have the all-white Bachelor Show and no Asian-Asian romance? Absolutely. At least for many years to come. Why? That is the last vestige white people will want to hold on to.

  84. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 7:24 am | | Reply

    Laura:

    Now who is who in all this? ie., who is Asian, who is white etc. Possible boyfriend came from a very redneck (Chinese or white) family. It is possible that he does not want to be friends with your bf because he is dating someone of another race. A very long time ago back in the summer of 1987 a basketball player in a famous school was dating Asian and black woman. He lost a lot of friends. He went on to the NBA and came flat out and said what happened in an interview back in 2005. He actually left the university after two years. It also may be because he had some bad experience in IR, but I doubt it.

  85. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 7:26 am | | Reply

    “I still think it is harder to be mixed couple in China. Social pressure can be quite high due to how the society functions.”

    Think Jocelyn may not agree. I remember her writing that mixed Asian-white kids were more popular in Asia than in the US.

  86. askdsk
    askdsk October 12, 2012 at 7:35 am | | Reply

    @David
    They are relatively popular as novelty. But I am not sure if that is all good. The Chinese society can be cruel and intolerant too. You essentially have to deal with same problems where these kids fit. In US, we are talking about more than 4% mixed race population.

  87. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 7:36 am | | Reply

    “My ex is a neo-conservative like George Bush. BTW, have you dated white women before?”
    I am considerably older than most of you folks. Yes, I am over 50. The answer to your question is no. Back in 1985, some whites at a midwestern university first thought that I was gay. Once they established that I was not gay, they got very concerned that I will end up dating white women. Why? Because I went regularly to church and after all as far as they were concerned, if a minority went to a white church, he was looking for white women. Why? Because that is what many white men do in places such as Hong Kong and Singapore. Look for Asian women. So they are thinking from experience. In the area I lived there were no Asian churches. So, they tried to set me up with a Taliban like moslem woman (or someone who will eventually end up in a Taliban-like organization). Yes, they nearly got me killed by fundamentalist moslems back in Asia…some of her relatives. Luckily for me there was another race obseessed white American woman in town who was trying to set up two Indians of different religions. She was not too happy that the Indian woman Christian was dating a Brit white. So, I got these fanatics to meet with her. They finally agreed with my defense before they beat me up. White racism got me nearly killed not by white racists but by taliban like fanatics. As far as the white guy who was pushing this…the moslems eventually caught up with him on 9/11/2001 near the WTC.

  88. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 7:49 am | | Reply

    “She is from upper middle class / wealthy class family similar to Romney, with conservative Republican background. She is quite intelligent with strong opinion and political believe. When I took her traveling in China and other part of world, her negative remarks about other cultures really irritated me.”

    Liberal and moderate white American women in Asia generally dont make negative remarks about Asian culture, but they will draw they line at interracial dating and marriage. I know many both here and in Asia and they are voting for Obama, although they do not want someone like him in their family. Why? Abortion. Roe Vs Wade. (47% of the white female American citizens). Not being able to win some of these women who if they are old enough voted for Reagan is a big problem for Romney in states such as Ohio and PA. Actually one of these women is in a commercial where she is acting the part of a closet racist congresswoman. She actually comes across as an authentic racist because she actually believes IR shoudl not happen. However, conservative white women take their bigotry to places such as Singapore. One woman from Alabama got furious when her daughter brought a 14 year old Chinese girl from her school home. Why? The mother suspected that the 16 year old brother may be interested in Asian girls and she did not approve of that. Needless to say, this is a kind of woman you describe. Actually I am a little bit surprised that they will go with you. Stunning, really.
    Go to some areas in CA. Upper middle class whites have contempt for all Chinese or Asians. Despite being the top academic achievers these white women think that Asians have inferior brains. Hence the fury after their enrollments declared sharply in Berkeley and UCLA after Affirmative Action was removed in 1996 particularly unhapply with jumps in Asian enrollments. White women were (are) the biggest beneficiaries of Affirmative Action. Now, there is a Supreme Court case on Affirmative Action. If it is ruled unconstitutional and the universities become more and more Asian, would the whites take it saying it is all based on merit. Based on the events of past two years on Australia and Canada, I dont think so.

  89. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 7:58 am | | Reply

    “In US, we are talking about more than 4% mixed race population.”
    In the US most Hapas, close to 90% of them are in the top 20% of high school graduates, and a staggering 50% of them are in the top 10% more than any other group. Tiger Mom’s kids come to mind but go to Gretchen Whitney HS in Cerritos, CA,…many, particularly the girls are Presidential scholars. I have met dumb people from all racial ethnic and racial groups, but not Hapas, and in particular, never met a dumb uneducated female Hapa. However, many still find it difficult to get in to top schools because they are re-classified as Asian if they say they are mixed. So they claim they are white. Heck, a Korean girl named Lee with a Christian first name claimed she was white in her application and after admission and going to the Ivy League school claimed she made a mistake.

  90. askdsk
    askdsk October 12, 2012 at 8:01 am | | Reply

    Considering Asians will often have to outperform all other groups including whites to get into top universities, getting rid of affirmative action is a good thing. These types of issues are complex. Upper class blacks are mostly against affirmative action. Black slaves fought for the South in civil war,etc.
    David, you might have lived through different time. I can sympathize any hardship. That is just how life is sometimes – unfair. But it is getting better overall for Asians. We can be proud of part of the heritage that helps us getting there.

  91. David
    David October 12, 2012 at 9:32 am | | Reply

    “Considering Asians will often have to outperform all other groups including whites to get into top universities, getting rid of affirmative action is a good thing.”

    But, that wont be achieved without white resentment. Whites who now resent blacks and Hispanics will resent Asians….

    http://www2.macleans.ca/2010/11/10/too-asian/

    http://www.vancouverobserver.com/blogs/divercity/2010/11/11/too-asian-too-racist-magazine-macleans

    White complaints about Asians remind me of an old Beetle Bailey comic strip. Sarge asks Beetle for a tennis game. Beetle says that the sarge wins every time. So beetle ties up sarge to a chair and plays against him and wins.

  92. Bruce
    Bruce October 12, 2012 at 9:54 am | | Reply

    I know other relatives and friends who have white ,black and latin wives but they just don’t come over here to share info. Yup, no need to ask for approval on who you want to love. You can give them one million dollars just to quiet them down for a while but in the long run they will be against you and also talk bad about you. This is a life lesson that I’ve learned so many freaking times.

  93. askdsk
    askdsk October 12, 2012 at 9:59 pm | | Reply

    @ David
    You might want to let some of that sentiment go. Time to live a little. We could all be killed by a bus while walking on the street.

    Sometimes you do need to beat people up. Like this one –

  94. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 13, 2012 at 7:25 am | | Reply

    @David

    Humbleness is not nature for most white people except English. In fact, humility is not nature for most people in their nature except Japanese and Chinese. The attitude you are looking for in white people will not come even they become minority.

  95. aiyangxifu
    aiyangxifu October 13, 2012 at 7:29 am | | Reply

    @David

    Humility is not natural for most white people except some English stocks. In fact, humility is not natureal for most people on this earth except Japanese and Chinese. The attitude you are looking for in white people will never come even they become minority in USA.

    Most people are narcissistic, which includes people living at bottoms, especially people at bottom. You should know that.

  96. askdsk
    askdsk October 13, 2012 at 8:26 am | | Reply

    US is also run by elites. I think these people all read Marx’s work, but turn around only discuss race. Every ordinary citizen is obsessed with it. Race basically matters less and less when you are up the social ladder.

    English is more like Japnese. Something to do with living on an island.

  97. cvaguy
    cvaguy October 13, 2012 at 9:01 pm | | Reply

    @askdsk – most people in US never heard about Karl Marx, but know about Barney, I believe. You give too much credit for TV society. But Elites are well educated well connected and very wealthy. Guess who is spending money for Romney?

  98. askdsk
    askdsk October 13, 2012 at 9:22 pm | | Reply

    @cvaguy
    That was an metaphor anyway.

  99. askdsk
    askdsk October 13, 2012 at 9:24 pm | | Reply

    A metaphor. Marx’s ideas of social class and others alike.

  100. Pelar
    Pelar October 15, 2012 at 6:14 am | | Reply

    @ aiyangxifu

    How old are you? The younger generation of Chinese are no longer that humble. The rise of China will be a game changer.

    I am not aware that British are more humble, maybe more liberal.

    @askdsk

    “Considering Asians will often have to outperform all other groups including whites to get into top universities, getting rid of affirmative action is a good thing.”

    This is not unique to america. It is the same almost everywhere.

    “She believe the whole world should learn from West and adopt Western culture.”

    My wife has similar penchant but expresses it subtly. Sometimes she thinks local customs are backward but she never shows her feeling publicly.

    12 years together of marriage with a great nine year old and I am still learning to walk by the rope.

    Generally, the white world thinks of social progress in a dialectical manner. Chinese people do not give two call hoots to this. Mostly are more concerned about their standard of living above anything else.

    @ David

    “Despite being the top academic achievers these white women think that Asians have inferior brains.”

    Sometimes I side with these white women considering that what interest them can rarely be found on a cursory inpection. Academic achievers regardless of race, could be less confident about their appearances and casual conversation vis-a-vis say an italian or French.

    “Think Jocelyn may not agree. I remember her writing that mixed Asian-white kids were more popular in Asia than in the US.”

    My son does get photographed often in Asia. In France, which is a very liberal country, people hardly pay attention to mixed couples nowadays. Things were very different a decade and a half ago.

    In Asia, we still invite stares wherever we go, approving or otherwise.

  101. askdsk
    askdsk October 15, 2012 at 6:41 am | | Reply

    “Generally, the white world thinks of social progress in a dialectical manner. Chinese people do not give two call hoots to this. Mostly are more concerned about their standard of living above anything else.”

    Couldn’t have said better.

    The younger generations are not humble inside of China. When they are out, similar behavior patterns still exist. The difference striking out most is general awareness of outside world because of globalization. But they are increasingly materialistic and nationalistic. If these youth can’t not carry out social changes, they are not game changers.

    Cultural studies tend to compare traditional English characters to Japanese in Asia. I am sure there are still truth to that.

  102. David
    David October 17, 2012 at 6:52 am | | Reply

    The younger generation in Singapore is very aggressive, but these days they are more anti other Asians than any white woman can ever be (Pelar’s wife cannot compete with that, heck even the anti-Asian folks in the Canadian McLean Magazine cannot compete with that)….they hold the Mainland Chinese and Indians from India in absolute contempt. Their contempt for the Middle Easterners and the Pakistanis/Bangladeshis is even higher. And yes, they all want a one way street. Would love to work in Shanghai, Australia, UK and elsewhere but dont want foreigners working in Singapore!

  103. askdsk
    askdsk October 17, 2012 at 7:55 am | | Reply

    @David
    That is about some fairest assessment coming from you. When you have a city that calls it a country, people have different views to themselves. Singapore is like HK – it is a place won’t be able to influence the world. The way to survive is to change faster than everyone else. I admire the work ethics once in a while, but people are destroying themselves. They grow up wanting to learn English and get all that education, but hold deep resentment about westerners. Majority of mainland Chinese are not anti-west, but your countrymen do to a deeper level.
    Some Singaporean confessed to me she would like to see China becomes more powerful. There is some common cultural bond. But these people really should get over themselves when they constantly feel life is on a string. That kind of sentiment is so unattractive to a western women. Also, this idea of wealth can cover all else is a deal breaker. Maybe that is why many of them get a Chinese mistress.

  104. David
    David October 18, 2012 at 11:46 am | | Reply

    “They grow up wanting to learn English and get all that education, but hold deep resentment about westerners. ”

    Not true of Singapore. They love white people particularly white women. Go to the Orchard underground mall, you will think you are in the panhandle of Florida, only white female models adorn the shops, no Singaporean, no Chinese and definitely no Indian, unless she is one of those movie actors like Preity Zinta who can literally pass for white.

    “Majority of mainland Chinese are not anti-west, but your countrymen do to a deeper level.”
    My countrymen? You mean the Americans?
    “Some Singaporean confessed to me she would like to see China becomes more powerful.”
    Surprising. Every Singaporean I talk to want America and the whites to remain powerful. “Ang Moh is better lah” is what you will hear people say. Yes my boss’s niece complained and still complains about racism of white women, particularly the Aussie white women. But, her response is completely different from what a black person or Indian would do. If an Indian faces racism, particularly a dark skinned Indian, he will run away from white women as soon as he can and as far as his legs can carry him. Not so, Chinese Singaporean girls or women.
    “That kind of sentiment is so unattractive to a western women.”
    White women beyond this blog and the AMWW blog find a lot of thing unattractive about the east or non-whites in general. I need not repeat this over and over again.

  105. askdsk
    askdsk October 18, 2012 at 12:27 pm | | Reply

    @David
    Interesting. You need to be nicer to your countrymen.

  106. David
    David October 19, 2012 at 6:18 am | | Reply

    “Interesting. You need to be nicer to your countrymen.”
    Just stating facts, particularly about my fellow country women of a particular social construct called race. But, I am still not happy about the ignorance of my fellow country men and women of this particular race getting me almost killed by moslems. You would not be happy too if you were in my place. And one more thing most white people will say Affirmative Action is not good and everyone has to be selected by merit and grades, but when they face competition from Asians, they dont like the idea of merit and grades but emphasize that “the applicant should be well rounded” whatever that is supposed to mean….I suspect it means white privilege and white people should get the shot all the time! Sad but true.

  107. askdsk
    askdsk October 20, 2012 at 12:24 pm | | Reply

    @David
    I can’t agree with all your views. We belong to different generations. But I respect your intelligence. To certain extent, Asians become the new Jewish in ivy league. Things are changing to be better overall.
    I personally support some variations of affirmative action, not using race as main consideration. Keep in mind there are disadvantaged Asian kids too.

    Here is something you probably like to read – http://www.esquire.com/features/thousand-words-on-culture/interracial-marriage-2012

  108. Joe
    Joe October 22, 2012 at 11:44 am | | Reply

    askdsk:

    If Abigail Fisher wins in the SCOTUS, Asian Americans denied admissions due to less qualified whites and others being admitted should sue. It may not help race relations or get more white women dating Asian men, but I dont believe there is a lot of white women out there who will date even Asian American men born in this country beyond those who participate in this blog and AMWW magazine. Yes, 90% approve of IR, but most wont do it themselves.

  109. Michael
    Michael October 28, 2012 at 2:51 am | | Reply

    “Despite being the top academic achievers these white women think that Asians have inferior brains.”

    Absolute BS. The problem (with the statistics, etc) is most Asian men are simply not attracted to White women. Men all over the world want pretty, kind, sexy, feminine women. It’s not about skin color. It’s about the attitudes that seem to pervade places like Canada and the US. To be sure, a South American beauty would have no problem bagging a great guy — in any country.

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