Is Beijing Becoming Dangerous for Couples of Foreign Men and Chinese Women? | Speaking of China

57 Responses

  1. R Zhao
    R Zhao August 17, 2015 at 6:51 am | | Reply

    I don’t think Beijing is dangerous, especially compared to any large city in the world. I would still argue it is actually quite safe. I think this was probably a random act of violence. The larger issue at hand may actually be mental health. Unfortunately, there is really little done for people who are suffering psychological issues, whether it be depression or schizophrenia. I remember there were some pretty horrific school stabbings in China several years ago and some of them were tied to individuals who had some pretty serious mental health problems. This is true in the US, too. Maybe we need more education about the importance of mental health and more ways to help people.

    I find this story horrific, but not as shocking as one should. When I first lived in China my (now) husband “exchanged words” with a man who made a nasty comment about us while we were walking down the street. We went into a nearby arcade but found it was closed. When we exited the building, the man was still outside. A car pulled up and he went in it. He came out. . . with a machete. And, yes, he chased my husband down the busy, early evening streets, wielding a machete. I hate to think what might have happened if my husband wasn’t a good runner.

    1. Autumn
      Autumn August 17, 2015 at 8:21 am | | Reply

      Holy crap, a machete?! No one said or did anything? How did I miss this post?

    2. Mary
      Mary August 18, 2015 at 1:59 am | | Reply

      Good god, Rosie! A machete!? This story warrants a blog post!!!

      It’s really sad that all of this is happening. I think, as Rosie said, mental illness is one big culprit. Anti-foreign sentiments still run strong with many conservative Chinese as well. It’s very sad.

      When I lived in China I heard many negative comments from locals, in particular, about white men marrying Chinese women. They were more upset with the women, saying that they ‘sold out’ or were ‘disgusting’ because some of them married purely for the ‘advancement opportunities’ the marriage presented. I never heard much complaints in terms of Chinese men dating foreign women, but maybe that was just me.

      This is so frightening. Machetes and swords…. eep.

  2. R Zhao
    R Zhao August 17, 2015 at 6:55 am | | Reply

    Oh, I just see I missed the very last Twitter posts and paragraph. Even if this is confirmed as a hate crime, I think the perpetrator must have had some very serious issues. And I maintain that I would still feel safe as a cross-racial couple in Beijing.

  3. Autumn
    Autumn August 17, 2015 at 8:19 am | | Reply

    To me, this feels like misogyny, dressed up in Nationalistic clothes. The fact that the woman was targeted, rather than the man, just screams Narcissistic Personality Disorder: “I’m entitled to a woman/ But I can’t get a woman/Women like someone else instead of me/ It’s all their fault / They deserve to die.”

    Western women get death threats from socially backward, entitled, immature gamers, internet trolls, or just guys in whom they have no interest.

    Sometimes women get more than threats.

    1. R Zhao
      R Zhao August 17, 2015 at 10:08 am | | Reply

      @Autumn, I think the man was actually injured, too. From the reports I read, two people were attacked. It’s hard to tell from the photos if he was also stabbed or if it is his wife’s blood. Didn’t something like this happen earlier in the year in the US? In one of the shootings the shooter claimed that no women gave him attention and they all deserved to die?

      As far as the machete, no, no one did anything. In China, people are often afraid or indifferent to helping strangers.

  4. Parth
    Parth August 17, 2015 at 10:15 am | | Reply

    It really sucks. These sort of people never look at themselves in the mirror. Chinese girls don’t want to date you but is willing to date a foreign guy?
    Why?
    Instead of realizing, that perhaps the foreign guy is a better person than you, or could connect with the her more than you could, and then try to make yourself better person to get her, you choose to assume that these girls are gold-digging, foreign worshiping b**ches.
    Seriously, it’s precisely the ‘it’s not me, it’s you’ kind of mentality that can’t get them any girls to begin with!
    I hope these men get harsh sentences. This is not alright.

    1. A & M
      A & M August 17, 2015 at 11:04 am | | Reply

      “that perhaps the foreign guy is a better person than you, or could connect with the her more than you could”

      Tell that to the sexpats that go to asian to f*** asian girls because they can’t get any in their respective countries. Foreign guy is better? Are you kidding me? Half of you expats come over to Asian won’t even integrate and speak the local language , and you look down on asian people, people who come to asia because they can’t make it , so they take advantage of locals. Just because you are white doesn’t mean you should be treated like a king. You’re a minority. Don’t expect to get treated like a king because you’re white.

      1. Parth
        Parth August 18, 2015 at 11:08 am | | Reply

        First of all, when did I say that foreign=white?
        Secondly, did I ever say that if you’re white, you should be treated like kings?
        Thirdly, did I ever say that I condone behaviors of sexpats? Or even better, mentioned them at all?
        I’m talking about these random cases of beatings and stabbings, when the people involved clearly did not know anything about the victims. How do you know that just because there are these ‘sexpats’ that give foreigners a bad name, that all foreigners are same?! What about all those Chinese tourists and people that give a bad name to China? Do you think they have the right to represent China or all those Chinese immigrants who are honest and good people? Because I sure as hell don’t want to be represented by them.
        What about the poor girl who was stabbed to death? You think she deserved to die just because she’s married to a foreign guy? How do you know that the foreigner she married wasn’t a good guy? Or let’s say she was a foreign worshiping b*tch and he was a sexpat, does that make it alright to murder or assault them? Is that how you want China to be seen as?
        Now let’s get to the perpetrators of the hate-crimes. I can only imagine that these people are angry, mostly likely because they can’t get girlfriends or had girlfriends stolen by foreigners. So all I’m saying is, rather than looking at the mirror and think: ‘hey, how can I improve myself so that I can get the girl of my dreams’ they put all their blames on the foreigners and the girls. Do you think it’s okay? I mean if they were really great to begin with, why aren’t Chinese girls into them?
        And if they want to continue arguing that those Chinese girls are foreign worshiping b*tches then why do they want to be with them in the first place? Why not just let the trash be with trash, and they can find their oh so perfect non-trashy girls, huh? Oh wait, I know why, it because they themselves have sh*tty and whiney-ass-b*tch personalities that neither the ‘good girls’ nor the ‘trashy girls’ want in the first place.

      2. PolishGirlWithShanghaiBF
        PolishGirlWithShanghaiBF June 13, 2016 at 2:42 am | | Reply

        Well said A&M!

        Parth puts down asian men, like all the racist sexpat likes to do – all while trying to portray himself as self-righteous… the hypocrisy cant get worse.

        I bet he frantically down votes AMWF videos, too.

  5. D-Maybe
    D-Maybe August 17, 2015 at 10:52 am | | Reply

    My instinct is to regard these incidents as an expression of resentment toward foreigner privilege (which is really white privilege) more broadly as opposed to foreign men sleeping with Chinese women because generally speaking, Chinese people, as a result of the values instilled in them by the culture, tend to adopt a hands-off approach to domestic matters of other people, and it’s also this very attitude, among other reasons, that makes Chinese people turn a blind eye to instances of domestic violence. One might come across snide remarks about foreign-Chinese couplings from time to time, but rarely will you get Chinese people who are motivated enough to actually do something about it.

    On the other hand, I’ve noticed that there has been a bit of growing backlash against foreigner privilege in recent years and not just in China but across East Asia in general, so maybe there’s some link between assaults on foreign men with Chinese women and resentment of foreigner privilege. Interestingly, it’s often Asians who have spent a considerable amount of time abroad who are the most vocal about foreigner privilege and it’s because these Asians know how Asians are treated in Western countries and they contrast it with how Westerners are treated in Asian countries.

    1. R Zhao
      R Zhao August 17, 2015 at 11:36 am | | Reply

      @D-Maybe, How would you explain that this is mostly against white (and I think sometimes black) men? I do think you are on to something, but it is complicated. As a foreign woman, I don’t think I am perceived as being as privileged or threatening as a western man is.

      1. D-Maybe
        D-Maybe August 17, 2015 at 12:08 pm | | Reply

        What I meant was simply that it’s white foreigners, generally speaking, who receive preferential treatment in China and in this regard I wasn’t really making a distinction between men and women. The easy acquisition of women is just one of the perks of being white in China, if you’re a man, that is. A black American man might also be treated well relative to the local Chinese people, but the chances are, this would be offset by the anti-black sentiments that Chinese people have.

  6. Nicki Chen
    Nicki Chen August 17, 2015 at 11:21 am | | Reply

    Such a sad story! They looked so happy in “before” photo.

  7. R Zhao
    R Zhao August 17, 2015 at 11:33 am | | Reply

    We also have to consider that the desperation some men feel in China to find a wife is driving them to the brink. If you look at the numbers, there just aren’t enough women, add to that, the pressures of the modern day dowry. This is a huge problem in modern Chinese society and I’m sure some young men are already bitter and then feel more outrage at foreigners taking “their women.” Obviously, violence is not the answer to this, but when people feel helpless they may lash out.

    This sometimes happens in America, too. It happened to me when I was dating a black American man. I was accused by a small group of black women (who I didn’t know) of “taking one of theirs.” I didn’t realize it at the time, but I think there is a lot of frustration. Black women face a lot of discrimination while dating and have a significant smaller dating pool than white women do because of cross-race dating preferences. This happens to Asian men as well.

    I don’t know. I’m curious to hear what others think about this.

    1. D-Maybe
      D-Maybe August 17, 2015 at 11:51 am | | Reply

      Yeah, in America Asian men and black women are at the bottom of the hierarchy in interracial dating and the recognition of this has prompted small groups among these demographics to develop an alliance of sorts, a feeling of solidarity, to address shared challenges as well as facilitate romantic relations with one another. A good example of this can be seen at the blog The Blasian Narrative:

      http://blasiannarrative.blogspot.tw/

  8. mukesh
    mukesh August 17, 2015 at 3:09 pm | | Reply

    Foreigners especially white guys think asian women as easy and talk nasty things even in foreign country. Bt when asian men goes out with white women in western countries, whites look down on them and pass racist comments against them.

    1. marghini
      marghini August 17, 2015 at 5:07 pm | | Reply

      Really? That never happened to me and my Chinese boyfriend.. Just luck?

  9. Juan
    Juan August 17, 2015 at 3:39 pm | | Reply

    Sanlitun has robbed many people. Western origin friends have been robbed with weapons… However they just wanted money. Not sure why this lady was stabbed to death…ill accept your description of a hate crime at face value.

  10. marghini
    marghini August 17, 2015 at 5:06 pm | | Reply

    That was such a terrible news.

    I also think it is an extreme consequence of an anti-white privilege sentiment that is getting stronger and stronger in Asia. As much as I understand the reason behind such sentiment, this is obviously not the right way to deal with Western privilege in Asia.

    1. asianamericannumber1
      asianamericannumber1 September 1, 2015 at 1:27 pm | | Reply

      I think this is great news. Finally something bad happens to the white guy. What way do you want to deal with it then?

  11. Rene
    Rene August 17, 2015 at 5:09 pm | | Reply

    Is it confirmed that this was indeed a hate crime? I haven’t searched for it online but I see no information here on even who did it much less a “motive.”

    Either way – it’s terribly sad. It could have been a hate crime.. it could have been just a mentally ill person. But, it’s a shame it happened. My heart goes out to everyone affected by that tragedy. 🙁

    I also want to address the “safety issue.” I’m a white American married to a Chinese man and I can assure people – it’s safer here in China than back in the States. There is just less crime here – and that’s a fact. Especially in the bigger cities. It amazes me how safe it is, honestly.

    But, that doesn’t men bad things don’t happen. My husband and I have had two encounters in our years in Shanghai. One was with an entire staff at a popular Peking duck restaurant in Shanghai. They took an extremely long time serving us and when we finally complained the head chef ran out of the kitchen and screamed “China China China!!” in my face then went on to speak ill of foreigners. That was one of the only times I felt threatened since the whole kitchen staff surrounded us and started getting violent.

    The second encounter being in the MTR. I was just walking calming hand in hand with my husband and a man *slammed* into me from behind. This wasn’t the normal Chinese bumping or pushing.. I could immediately tell it was an aggressive act (considering it was not a packed area). I pushed him away from me and he started cursing at me in English. It escalated quickly from there. He was shoving me and I was pushing back. Then, he grabbed me around the throat! That’s when my husband jumped on him and pinned him to the ground. During our scuffle he had bruised my arm pretty good but I was fine.

    I am sure both of my experiences were purely driven by hatred of foreigners. But, that is just two instances out of years of being here. The majority of people here have only ever showed me kindness. Racism seems to rear it’s ugly head in any country.. but, in my personal opinion, most people in China are above that.

  12. Timo
    Timo August 17, 2015 at 7:27 pm | | Reply

    This is just terrible. Whether it is due to a hate crime or not someone died due to it. There will be always people driven by hatred or by some mental issues and I don’t see anything possible to prevent it at the moment.

    During my first trip to China some years back we visited during the last day Beijing and I was kicked in the back by someone and he jumped on me while I was on the ground. Only the presence of my father (first time my parents in China and they see this….now they are not too keen to visit again) who is still pretty well build for is back then 72 years helped to block further attacks as he grabbed that guy and threw him aside. All the while this guy was cursing foreigners and calling my wife pretty terrible things. Police only said that they cant do anything and I should be happy that I didnt get injured any worse.

    That was the first and so far only attack on me which happened in China. Usually it is just the basic name calling towards me and my wife when we go around.

  13. David
    David August 17, 2015 at 10:43 pm | | Reply

    “Half of you expats come over to Asian won’t even integrate and speak the local language , and you look down on asian people, people who come to asia because they can’t make it , so they take advantage of locals.”

    I have a tough time believing that these racist folks who look down on the locals (several in Singapore) go after local women. In fact, those white men will not even touch an Asian woman with his hand.

  14. David
    David August 17, 2015 at 10:49 pm | | Reply

    “Interestingly, it’s often Asians who have spent a considerable amount of time abroad who are the most vocal about foreigner privilege and it’s because these Asians know how Asians are treated in Western countries and they contrast it with how Westerners are treated in Asian countries.”

    Asians who live in Asia are naïve and believe that when in the west, they will be treated like they treat the westerners (whites). But, even without accessing the internet to determine how Asians are treated in say Australia or Vancouver, Canada, you will get the first indications when you talk to a westerner especially Christian missionaries. They will pontificate that you should get your education and come back to serve your own country. In most cases what they mean is do not date our daughters and settle down in the US…so much for Christian love and empathy, not very different from the Indian caste system. If you still don’t get it, you may be in for a surprise when you land in the west. People may not treat you badly depending on where you are, but you wont be treated like the Asians treat the whites.

    1. A & M
      A & M August 18, 2015 at 11:39 am | | Reply

      Your right about it being a caste system. America is basically a caste system. Your born into it , and your life is decided arbitrarily by your skin color , by the system of white supremacy. Basically if your an asian man coming to america or any minority man: Come to america ! Get an education here! But date our women? NO WAY! We’ll even take your women too and make them hate themselves! We’ll make you hate yourself. Not white ? S*** out of luck , white supremacy was not created to benefit you at all! You’re an minority and you have dating problems ? career problems? You’re just being bitter! You don’t have any problems!

      Asians in asia are really naive as hell about racial issues. But its up to asians that were born overseas to educate our breathren back home to make sure they don’t get taken advantage of by foreigners who go to asia to take it easy.

  15. David
    David August 17, 2015 at 10:53 pm | | Reply

    “Foreigners especially white guys think asian women as easy and talk nasty things even in foreign country. Bt when asian men goes out with white women in western countries, whites look down on them and pass racist comments against them.”

    @Mukesh..thanks for saying what I have been repeating again and again.

    “This sometimes happens in America, too.”

    @R. Zhao…happens more frequently than you think.

    1. R Zhao
      R Zhao August 18, 2015 at 7:17 am | | Reply

      What happens more frequently than I think? I’m not sure what you are referring to.

  16. David
    David August 17, 2015 at 10:56 pm | | Reply

    “Really? That never happened to me and my Chinese boyfriend.. Just luck?”

    Where in the west have you visited? Southern US? Try running into tea party and Donald Trump supporters. Have you walked through working class white areas in London?

    However, it is a tragedy that the Chinese have learnt from others particularly the Afrikaaners and the US southern whites. I was hoping that they will not stoop to the level of these two groups.

    1. Autumn
      Autumn August 18, 2015 at 2:44 am | | Reply

      Whoa, there, David! I think it’s quite a stretch to blame racism against whites in China on Americans’ and Afrikaners’ treatment of people of color.

      If I remember correctly (and I am sure someone will correct me if I don’t, and probably even if I do, right, Mukesh & D-Maybe?), the Chinese were plenty xenophobic before the United States or the Boers even existed. There were — and still are — derogatory terms such as “white devil,” “monkey” “barbarian,” and “dwarf” used on Westerners and even the Japanese (before the invasion in the 1930s).

      China also has the most minorities of any country. And how have they been treated, historically? All equal citizens before the law? No oppression whatsoever?

      But back to Jocelyn’s post and your comment. From the stories various expats relate, does it really seem like most of the attacks are from embittered world travelers who went to Africa and the United States? Or from a poorer socioeconomic group that feels entitled to blame their troubles on a random white person?

      Look, I own my country’s racism, especially against African-Americans and Latinos. You are right. Racism exists in the United States. I see it, I speak out against it, and I urge others to do the same. Black lives matter. Our police force currently has too much power. And not just in the south. The Los Angeles Police Department scares me, and I’m white.

      America has propaganda — in the form of Fox News, Rush Limbaugh, and Glen Beck — that constantly tells conservative white America that African-Americans are scary, Mexicans are lazy, and the government is going to take their guns and give everything to the minorities. The Americans who watch this media get fed the line that they are special, Christianity is under attack, and their way of life is in jeopardy. Willfully ignorant white folk will swallow this idiocy whole. (It’s amazing, because they’ve actually been tricked into voting with the Republican Party and against their own economic self-interest, but that’s a whole other discussion.)

      Many poor white people have crap lives, and they want to blame it on someone. Liberal elites. Immigrants. African-Americans. President Obama. Everyone else somehow “stole their country.” Fox News offers up weekly sound bytes generated by the Republican Party, and gives their audience one-word answers to complex problems. And some people like that. Some Americans like to think that the Confederate Battle flag has nothing to do with slavery, either.

      So I ask again, where does the racism in China come from? Ours is homegrown. In fact, the biggest terrorist threat to the U.S. is an American-born white male. Even the FBI says so.

      It’s easy to blame another race for your misery. Poor white Americans do it all the time.

  17. David
    David August 17, 2015 at 10:59 pm | | Reply

    @Marghini…there are many Asians who particularly don’t like the White English people..and with good reason…while they have been hogging themselves with all the good jobs in places such as Hong Kong, they don’t want to slow down Asian foreign labor to a trickle in the UK..and some of it might be the natural reaction to what Cameron and his racist English ilk have been doing since winning the elections.

  18. mukesh
    mukesh August 18, 2015 at 12:40 am | | Reply

    white guys and girls looks down on asian. They think they r the superior on earth and oftenly looks down on asian in their particular country and even in asian countries. They think passing racist remarks against asian is normal whether it is in public, social ndtworking sites or tv shows. Eg jimmy kimmel, sarah silverman, sharon stone etc. Do u white people think us as weak.? No, u dnt knw anything abt us. By the way, the days of white priviledge in asia is over. U can roam, eat and do watever u want here bt behave properly and respect the local people and culture. Thank u

  19. MM
    MM August 18, 2015 at 10:15 am | | Reply

    @ Mukesh and @David

    “they think they r the superior on earth and often look down on Asians”, REALLY!!!!! And how many white folks have you surveyed to come up with this sweeping analogy? I know you didn’t speak to this white girl.

    Sure there are people who think they and their culture/race is better or more superior then others, my guess is that these individuals also feel they “superior” then other individuals from their own country/race/culture, every country has these individuals.

    Do you think the Chinese guy driving his Ferrari down Huahai Lu doesn’t feel superior! He knows he is superior because “he has a Ferrari” ( the ultimate status symbol). You think he’s not feeling superior to the white guy or to the Chinese man riding a trailer bike collecting recyclables…… of course he is and (and I’m making a big generalization) many Chinese would look at him and say “yes he is better than me, he has money, he has status, he has made it.” WHY? If you don’t have self respect, self esteem, self belief in yourself and your ability ( no matter what you have or do not have) then you’ll allow anyone or anything to be better or be superior to you.

    David made a comment “Foreigners especially white guys think Asian women are easy and talk nasty things “ these guys are full of themselves ( and they’d be full of themselves in their own country), they wouldn’t respect or treat any women with much regard or respect no matter which Country she came from. I’m guessing the difference is that “white women” would tell these guys to f….off, where as the majority of Asian girls wouldn’t. Many a times I’ve been in places /situations where I’ve asked myself the question “what is she ( Chinese girl) doing with a d..k like him”.

    But David do you not think that there are Asian guys with the same belief about “White women” (that they are easy), so what’s the difference between the two? The honor and respect of a woman should be the same no matter if she’s Chinese or White – that’s if the man actually respects them,

  20. Lan Lan
    Lan Lan August 18, 2015 at 10:40 am | | Reply

    ” By the way, the days of white priviledge in asia is over.” I agree. The days of white priviledge in asia is over. White people, pls stop thinking of yourself as a king any more. Those who still think you are a king in China or Asia are very ridiculous. Please get noted, thanks.

  21. Sveta
    Sveta August 18, 2015 at 11:41 am | | Reply

    What happened is very terrible 🙁 its funny how recently I keep hearing a lot about white male priveledge. Still, in order to move past the problem of white male priveledge, we and those responsible have to acknowledge its existence, but I can’t imagine that happening any time soon. I mean, people give up power very very reluctantly, and only if there is no choice. If things will continue as they are without addressing the issues then it will be a lot worse before it gets better. God forbid, but who knows, perhaps a Chinese group similar to Taliban will rise up and take over China, making it follow ancient precepts instead of modern ones. Things never stay the same.

  22. A.Madhavan
    A.Madhavan August 18, 2015 at 12:55 pm | | Reply

    This is so scary. I can’t help but notice the deep misogyny in this murder – many times when we date out of our race/nationality, men of our race will try to “claim” us and shame us for dating/marrying outside of it. As if we are pieces of property and only belong to them. I have seen this happen with white men to white women; black men to black women; Indian men to Indian woman – how dare a we women marry outside her race and have complete autonomy over our decisions? It is threatening to A LOT of people…
    This murder is so ignorant because by saying they are teaching her a lesson for “sleeping” with a “foreign man” – they are essentially reducing their love to something less deep, something more sexualized and exotic than same-race couples would face. I’m sure they were completely unaware that they were actually married. People see a mixed race couple and they automatically just think that it is impermanent – or worse, that the woman is slutty for doing so.

  23. SBC
    SBC August 18, 2015 at 8:31 pm | | Reply

    Whether there are white people who act like kings in Asia (there are), or white people that mistreat asians in western countries (there are. Cameron and his ilk are a disgrace to humanity), or whether there are asian women who are racist towards asian men and prefer white men (again there are); NONE of that justifies taking an innocent life so randomly, even in the least bit. Those are social issues, but attacking random people is NEVER a solution and always an act of cowardice. Now the onus is on the Chinese judicial system to put these transgressors to justice.

    I also hesitate to call an entire place or population racist. For every 2-3 people who are racist you AT LEAST meet 2-3 people who are not. Why do we pick those 2-3 racist pigs to be the representative of that population over the 2-3 nicer people? In reality the ratio is even more skewed. Most people are at least half decent. But one instance like this leaves a much stronger mark because we are more affected by fear than compassion.

    I also agree with R Zhao that the mental health aspect of this is being ignored, when that is probably the biggest cause of such an instance. I mean, normal men, however looser-ish, would go around stabbing women unless they had underlying mental health issues.

    Finally, I agree that IR relationships come with the huge burden of a constant discussion on race. Whether its offensive or politically correct, for an IR couple it seems like a privilege to find acceptance of their love for their other half for who they are rather than which race they belong to. When I am with my other half, the most vivid thing for me is the comfort I feel when I look into his eyes and the relief and happiness I feel when I see him smile. His racial features may make him who they are. But their relevance stops from that point on. So if these are indeed racially motivated crimes, then shame on those people.

    If you hate sexpats and sarong girls, then dont be like them. Be a better person, and you wont feel bad for the sarong girls leaving you; because you wouldnt date a sarong girl in the first place.

  24. David
    David August 18, 2015 at 10:59 pm | | Reply

    “David made a comment “Foreigners especially white guys think Asian women are easy and talk nasty things “ these guys are full of themselves ( and they’d be full of themselves in their own country), they wouldn’t respect or treat any women with much regard or respect no matter which Country she came from. I’m guessing the difference is that “white women” would tell these guys to f….off, where as the majority of Asian girls wouldn’t. Many a times I’ve been in places /situations where I’ve asked myself the question “what is she ( Chinese girl) doing with a d..k like him”.”

    @MM…I did not make the comment, but quoted someone else on this board. Please be careful while posting. I do not think Asian men think white women are easy…I think they are the forbidden fruit and are simply plain afraid to ask them out for fear of loosing face if rejected.

    “But David do you not think that there are Asian guys with the same belief about “White women” (that they are easy), so what’s the difference between the two? The honor and respect of a woman should be the same no matter if she’s Chinese or White – that’s if the man actually respects them,”

    @MM…I agree, but I think it is mostly South Asian men rather than East Asian men who think along these lines.

    “Do you think the Chinese guy driving his Ferrari down Huahai Lu doesn’t feel superior! He knows he is superior because “he has a Ferrari” ( the ultimate status symbol). You think he’s not feeling superior to the white guy or to the Chinese man riding a trailer bike collecting recyclables…… of course he is and (and I’m making a big generalization) many Chinese would look at him and say “yes he is better than me, he has money, he has status, he has made it.” ”

    @MM…In the US, he can feel as superior as he wants and live in a world of illusion or delusion, but reality will catch up with him and it does not even spare a Chinese American Multi-Billionaire as Justin Kan found out three days ago, in the most liberal city in the USA….and they are not even interracially married…

    http://blog.sfgate.com/techchron/2015/08/16/justin-kan-founder-of-justin-tv-and-twitch-victim-of-hate-crime/

    One more point: Missionaries these days, even those who have been around for forty years in India have stopped telling people that they should come back home and help the country…I think back in the 1970s it was a diplomatic way of saying…”don’t try and date our white daughter or son!” In the early 1980s when I went to a well known university in Indiana, I heard that white folks have told their daughters to stay away from Indian “perverts” because they are looking to marry a white woman and stay in this country…they did not know that the laws have been changed since 1965, (on October 3 they are celebrating the passage of the Hart-Cellar legislation) and the law in place allowed migration through channels other than marrying an American citizen, whatever the race…once folks came to know about this law, they no longer worried too much about a non-white person trying to stay on in the country through marrying their white daughters…this was the reality.

  25. David
    David August 18, 2015 at 11:08 pm | | Reply

    @SBC…I agree with everything you say. May be the guy was mad he did not get a visa to a western country..but this poor guy was trying to get a visa for his wife to move to France. I know several Brits stuck in Singapore and Malaysia who are married to locals but cannot get a visa for their wives…my doctor included and if you are an English woman married to a local, you can forget going back to your country with your family under the Cameron-Theresa May regime. I heard something similar happened to Venetia of the Japanese TV NHK back in the 1980s…she remained in Japan raising her family there. If that happens in the US. ACLU will make sure the politician is tarred and shamed…and he or she will never run for office again.

  26. David
    David August 18, 2015 at 11:09 pm | | Reply

    Correction: this poor guy was PROBANLY trying to get a French visa for his wife.

  27. David
    David August 18, 2015 at 11:10 pm | | Reply

    90% of the world’s population is racist, ethnocentric or caste and tribe-conscious to some degree…hence for inter-community and international marriages it takes special skills to survive in a bigoted world.

  28. MM
    MM August 19, 2015 at 9:24 am | | Reply

    @ David

    Apology for putting your name against a comment you didn’t make.

    Re article about Justine Kan. Yes racially motivated. My thought is people who hate, who are racist and angry are scared individuals who are afraid, ignorant (?), maybe irrational, “nurtured this way” or maybe feel like a victim ( they come here to steal our……….). These people live in their own presumptuous world who can’see any other reason but their own.

    Every country has these individuals but what l am seeing more in the media is that the words of these individuals is becoming louder and louder.

    It’s distasteful that the individual was racially marked, more often write ups like this is based on who the individual is; in this case a successful, well known Asian American billionaire. My guess is that they wouldn’t have done a ‘write up’ if the same thing happened to a regular Asian American guy living in down town suburbia.

    ( Great to read that the neighbour came out to help even though he pained the wrong way 🙂

    Maybe l am naive but l’d like to believe that for every person who hates there is 1+ more people who are good and humane and respect their fellow man.

  29. David
    David August 20, 2015 at 6:40 am | | Reply

    “My guess is that they wouldn’t have done a ‘write up’ if the same thing happened to a regular Asian American guy living in down town suburbia” @MM……………..unless he has a white fiancé or wife and was attacked.

    I also wish that you get an Asian husband and have super smart children if that is what you want.

  30. tonyget
    tonyget August 20, 2015 at 5:44 pm | | Reply

    @R Zhao

    You are right, it is essentially a manifestation of underlaying gender ratio imbalance issue.

    I said this a thousand times already, there is absolutely no way a society is able to sustain with tens of millions surplus males, collapse is inevitable. The only solution is war, which is the quickest way to “waste” male population. A nation with surplus male hormone is more aggressive and war-like by nature, western intellectuals already warned that Chinese gender ratio issuse will eventually become fuse of WWIII.

    Foreign men take Chinese women only accelerate this process, create more frustrate and angry men who will become the source of social instability. If one day Chinese society collapsed or war started, foreign men shall hold responsible.

  31. David
    David August 20, 2015 at 7:34 pm | | Reply

    Despite benefits from dowry which the man or the man’s family pays, the Chinese tend to abort female fetuses….the Chinese are responsible for the predicament….and no one is stopping them from marrying overseas Chinese or other Asians…especially the educated ones. However, in most Chinese families they prefer to marry Chinese failing which they would rather have a white female over other Asians…the biggest problem is although there is a slight surplus of white women in the world, which is also increasing as a result of Asian women marrying white men…very few white women date non-white men, not just Chinese men…partly because they may be racist themselves but mostly because they are afraid of their families. Actually about a decade ago ran into an Aussie woman who said her brothers would never approve of her dating or marrying anyone other than Aussie (meaning white)..strange though, both are married to Asian women from Singapore who also happen to be sisters!

  32. David
    David August 20, 2015 at 7:38 pm | | Reply

    The reverse is also true…in a truly non-racist world the imbalance can be corrected especially among educated people…shortage of men in NZ….

    http://callister.co.nz/nz-man-drought.pdf

  33. tonyget
    tonyget August 20, 2015 at 8:01 pm | | Reply

    Since you mentioned NZ, as I live in auckland. I can tell you that the situation here isn’t much different from the rest of Anglo-Saxon countries, you see AF/WM on the street, but you don’t see AM/WF.

    So you got this funny situation: on one hand there is surplus kiwi women can’t find men, on the other hand many asian men in this countries struggle to find women. I know a lot of Chinese guy who has been here for over a decade never had a girlfriend.

  34. tonyget
    tonyget August 20, 2015 at 8:50 pm | | Reply

    @David

    Actually, it is the consequence of one child policy, so the blame goes to CCP regime. In rural China, family actually prefer to have one son + multiple daughter, so they can use daughter’s dowry to find a woman for the son. It is simply demand and supply, the market will balance itself had there be no stupid policy.

    Nevertheless, foreign men take chinese women aggravates the issue, this is a fact that no one can deny. Two wrongs doesn’t make one right, criticize chinese family/government don’t make foreign men any less guilty.

  35. David
    David August 20, 2015 at 10:02 pm | | Reply

    If Chinese women are what the Chinese men want plenty of Chinese women in the Philippines, Taiwan, Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Thailand etc. who will date and marry Chinese men. In fact, Filipina Chinese women would prefer to live in Shanghai or Beijing over Manila because these two cities are way ahead of Manila, Jakarta and even Bangkok. If the Chinese men took some incentive they can get a few dates from these countries. Secondly, don’t absolve the overseas Chinese men…the highest rate of international marriages for males in Singapore is between the local Chinese men and the Chinese woman from China…so they are also playing a role in depleting Chinese women from China, not just the whites.

    As far as Chinese men not getting Chinese women dates, welcome to America, join the miserable company of not just Chinese men but also Asian men. They say nearly 50% of Asian men in America will never get married, partly due to Asian women marrying white men and partly due to Chinese men fearing the suspected racist reactions from white women or their families if they ask them out on a date.

  36. David
    David August 20, 2015 at 10:05 pm | | Reply

    @tonyget…they can join the American company…Know a lot of Chinese and Asian men here who have never had a girlfriend. But, NZ women not having boyfriends is unique…white American women at least most of them have boyfriends. I would have thought that a prominent female singer in NZ having an Asian boyfriend might change some attitudes…but obviously not!

  37. tonyget
    tonyget August 20, 2015 at 11:28 pm | | Reply

    @David

    The composition of asians in NZ is very different from those in US/Australia/EU.

    There is very few second generations, asian population in this country is very young. Most of Chinese originally came here as student after year 2000, after graduation some found job and settled down.

    Most of Chinese guys don’t approach kiwi girls due to language/culture barrier (common among first generation immigration).

    Currently the majority second generation asian guys are in elementary school, it is still unclear in the future whether they will become more like their american counterparts or something else.

    The white people here isn’t as aggressive as those in the US/Australia or arrogant as those in Europe, at least on the surface.

  38. Lynsea
    Lynsea December 15, 2015 at 10:14 am | | Reply

    What about White women/Chinese men couples? Is there any danger in that kind of relationship?

    1. David
      David December 29, 2015 at 5:33 am | | Reply

      Do you want to try it out in the US? Try attending a Trump rally with a WW holding the hand of an AM. I am not legally responsible for any harm that may come to a AMWW or AWWM couple who take up my suggestion.

  39. jixiang
    jixiang May 4, 2016 at 9:47 pm | | Reply

    I think that while Beijing isn’t yet especially dangerous to walk around for mixed couples, the general atmosphere in China is getting more xenophobic, and this can eventually boil over into violence.

    To those talking about “white privilege”: this is nothing to do with white privilege. It’s to do with a Chinese government which pushes and promotes simplistic nationalism and resentment of “foreigners” of all kinds, and of foreign countries.

    It is simply untrue that white people are given “special privileges” in China today. While in some situations foreigners may be given more leeway and treated nicer than locals, in other situations they may be discriminated or treated worse. It depends. But the truth is that no matter how foreigners are treated in practice, it doesn’t matter. It’s the Chinese media and educational system which create xenophobia, not some “white privilege” which most Chinese have never even encountered in practice, and which makes no difference at all to their lives.

  40. Jack
    Jack May 23, 2016 at 12:54 am | | Reply

    White male supremacy and endless promotion of white male supremacy is the root of this issue. Since the era of industrialization and end of WW II, America has been promoting white male supremacy throughout the world using Hollywood.

    Stalin once said if he can control Hollywood, he can control the world. Hollywood is simply brainwashing the world currently with white male standard of beauty. Hollywood movies are being viewed worldwide, and Hollywood is run by racist white men with only interest of promoting white males to the detriment of everyone else.

    Any minority men growing up in the West know this. White men are some of the most racist people on earth. America media is trained to brainwash people in America and worldwide that white men are the best. American media promotes white male supremacy daily across all media. White men get all the leads in Hollywood movies while Asian men are treated worse than crap in American movies. This kind of constant negative images has had a huge impact on the social lives of Asian men and Asian men living in the West. Most people don’t even realize this when it is happening to them until later in life. With the Internet, people are becoming more aware of these inequalities.

    There is a site just started tracking images of Hollywood and American TV on their images of Asians. The constant theme in Hollywood is this:

    1) Asian men are a bunch of losers that beat on women. They are losers, non-romantic, and geeks,
    2) White men are heroes to liberate Asian women from Asian men. White men are the ultimate romantic heroes, superheroes, or just heroes in every movie.
    3) Asian women are always portrayed as sexually available to white men in all the movies while the reverse is never true (Asian men with white women). This is also mostly true for black men with white women despite the fact there are plenty of black men white women couples in real life. Black men are on TV in somewhat positive roles due to sports. White men simply can’t exclude black men from TV due to sports.
    4) When it comes to any of kind of interracial couples on TV or in Hollywood movies, the men is usually white men 95% of the time.
    5) For Asians, it is about constant promotion of white male/Asian female couples on TV. Asian men/Asian women couples are invisible despite being the majority of couples in Asia or worldwide. It is all about promoting white men/Asian women couples for white guys.

    As more Asians become aware of this constant one-sided affair, many will become angry. Many in Asia are still clueless about this. Asian guys living in the West know this very well if they bother to read anything on the Internet. Asian people in Asia think if they treat white people nicely in Asia, they will get the same treatment in the West, which is not true at all. Some probably realized this, and they are lashing out on white men in Asia who are there to abuse their white privilege due to relentless Hollywood white male promotion.

    Some people are starting to track some of these images of Asians in American movies. The images are simply disturbing. You can check it out for yourself: http://www.kulturemedia.org. Check this out: http://www.kulturemedia.org/page-about-us.php

    I will say one thing about white female/Asian men couple. I don’t think anyone need to worry too much about this pairing from Asian men. White men have trained all women to hate on Asian men. White men have taught white women since birth to hate and make fun of Asian men. White women who grew past these brainwashing and ventured out of their comfort zones should be proud of themselves. It is not easy to overcome all the brainwashing since birth. Asian men should appreciate all women who can look beyond the negative portrays of Asian men by Hollywood or the West.

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