Double Happiness: A Brief, But Beautiful, Spanish-Chinese Romance | Speaking of China

28 Responses

  1. Pamela
    Pamela November 16, 2012 at 4:20 am | | Reply

    bittersweet story…
    thanks Lauren for sharing. Animo!!

  2. fernandocruz
    fernandocruz November 16, 2012 at 6:15 am | | Reply

    Well,I believe in u,lauren,wish u good luck,next time.

  3. askdsk
    askdsk November 16, 2012 at 10:47 am | | Reply

    I find it is strange someone has to go home because of dissertation.

  4. Simon
    Simon November 16, 2012 at 11:29 am | | Reply

    Very touching story. Sometimes the memories are all we have but we learn to cherish them none the less.

  5. Sveta
    Sveta November 16, 2012 at 3:36 pm | | Reply

    Sweet story Lauren, thanks for sharing and sorry it didn’t work out between you and Phillip.

  6. Manny
    Manny November 16, 2012 at 4:05 pm | | Reply

    @Lauren. Don’t give up so easily. I am a White boy trying to chase a Chinese goddess right now and things are looking good for me despite the distance. Don’t surrender!

  7. Kalvinator
    Kalvinator November 16, 2012 at 5:06 pm | | Reply
  8. oegukeen
    oegukeen November 16, 2012 at 5:37 pm | | Reply

    A really touching story. I am in a long-distance relationship between Europe and Korea. Even though we are happy now, there is always this fear at the back of my mind that something will happen and tear us apart forever.

    Relationships end, but rarely do you think it might end even while both are still madly in love.

  9. chinaelevatorstories
    chinaelevatorstories November 16, 2012 at 6:10 pm | | Reply

    It breaks my heart just reading this story (not a fan of not-so-happy endings)! It can be really hard (or even impossible) overcoming obstacles like long-distance. There’s a saying: 错过一个人,是为了遇到对的人 – I hope this holds true for Lauren.

  10. Cvaguy
    Cvaguy November 16, 2012 at 7:25 pm | | Reply

    Love is that intense feeling for each other. Cherish it, however long it lasts…

  11. askdsk
    askdsk November 16, 2012 at 9:35 pm | | Reply

    I think the guy find lame excuses to break up with someone. Girl like that will follow him to China.

  12. E. Woo
    E. Woo November 17, 2012 at 9:15 am | | Reply

    I think I know Philip’s predicament. Where he was concerned, he failed! A Chinese man will give up the love of his life when he feels that he cannot take care of her, believing she can do better. He probably felt ashamed of his failure as well. Even if Lauren can go to China and do well there, Philip may not be able accept the idea that she becomes the breadwinner. By the way, I have no concrete evidence but I recall hearing a lot of Spanish spoken in tourist areas in China, much more than English. As a matter of fact, I heard more Germanic tones than English. I think China may present opportunities for Lauren if she choose to go some day.

  13. Ashleigh Son
    Ashleigh Son November 17, 2012 at 10:19 am | | Reply

    *sniffle* Oh my. This story made me tear up a bit. I have had a relationship that did not work, because of distance. I felt worse than anything when I broke this Chinese boy’s heart. It felt like a lie to be in love from that far away, and before I knew it I had to break the news to him that it would not work out. Also I ended up falling in love with my best friend, with whom I had also met at the same time as him online. Goodness. Honesty is the best policy though and it is not fair to both of you to go through that. And on my side, I ended up marrying my best friend later on down the road, so it was worth it.

  14. Laura
    Laura November 17, 2012 at 11:04 am | | Reply

    Lauren: Animo chica, que la vida es muy corta! 🙂

    Beautiful story, but it’s sad that it ended this way. It seems like he really took a very cowardly route to stop contacting you like that. What reasons did he give you for this?

    I’m also from Spain and in a relationship with a Chinese man, but fortunately we’re both firmly rooted in the USA so that’s one less hurdle to overcome. Although it’s too early to tell, it’s such a culturally enriching experience. I hope it sticks.

    Either way, I hope you’re doing alright now. Cherish the memories of your time together and don’t worry. 🙂

  15. David
    David November 17, 2012 at 2:07 pm | | Reply

    A young Japanese executive for a Japanese auto company was seeing a white volleyball coach in Jefferson County, Alabama. She was a transplant from Indiana and comes from a prominent volleyball family. His family was also involved in volleyball back in Japan and they had common interests. However, it was not acceptable to the neighbors who found it revoliting that a white woman would date an Asian guy in the well-known all-white suburb of Birmingham. So, they convinced the corporation to send him back to Japan for good. They revoked his visa and put him on a plane. She was out on a recruiting trip when that happened and was stunned to find out that he had left without telling her..she was heartbroken. She quit the coaching job and went back home to Indiana. Not a tale. This happened in 2009!

  16. Blossom
    Blossom November 17, 2012 at 4:36 pm | | Reply

    @ David! That is a heartbreaking story too. Interference and control from outside the lovers’ relationship is even worse than struggling with shame and distance 🙁

  17. MyTwoCents
    MyTwoCents November 17, 2012 at 7:22 pm | | Reply

    Not as heart-breaking as this one:
    http://thedowntowndiner.blogspot.com/
    Melanie Gao and her Chinese husband are getting divorced.

  18. Manny
    Manny November 19, 2012 at 10:09 am | | Reply

    @Kalvinator. Thanks for sharing the beutiful video story of A.J. the Chinese man falling in love with a beautiful British girl. Have you and videos showing success stories between White male & Chinese woman? Please post the link if you have any. Thanks.

  19. Laura
    Laura November 20, 2012 at 5:35 pm | | Reply

    Hi Lauren,
    I don’t know if you will read this, is an interesting story, not everyone is brave enough to publish such a story.

    Where are you exactly from? I have never heard Lauren as a Spanish name, but as a foreign name, should I understand you are mixed or this is your nickname?

    Keep in mind that experience is what matters, maybe he was very afraid of distance? Maybe he wasn’t brave enough?

    Well…I will say.. ” whatever”, enjoy life and …if you come to China you can visit another Spanish Laura here in Shanghai!

    L

  20. Sophia D
    Sophia D December 3, 2012 at 6:24 pm | | Reply

    Hi! Please remove my photo! I did not give permission for it to be used. Thanks!

  21. Laura
    Laura December 3, 2012 at 6:52 pm | | Reply

    @Sophia D,
    I don’t think Jocelyn meant to use the photo without permission, she is an expert on sources, copywriter…
    In fact if you check this link:
    http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/deed.es
    You will read that when you post pictures in that website the Licence says that people can “share, copy, distribute and communicate” the photo, always mentioning who is the author ( under the picture “Sophia D”).

    There are exemptions, like always.. Anyway I am sure Jocelyn will find a solution.

    But I suggest you always double check this before you publish material on the internet or this could happen to you again!

    Protecting your material is an important as your own privacy!

  22. Sophia D
    Sophia D December 4, 2012 at 4:26 am | | Reply

    I understand my license, and thank you for linking it to my flickr page, however, I would appreciate it if you take it down. It’s part of a project that’s personal to me. Thanks, and sorry for the misunderstanding.

  23. Laura
    Laura December 4, 2012 at 10:43 pm | | Reply

    @Sophia,
    I have visited your link ( the one you linked to your name when you commented here), you have nice pictures, I can see you are learning to take pictures, cause is easy to see the improvements, and light..etc.
    If you want to publish your pics on the internet, and your pictures will be for private use or if you pretend to use them as your own portfolio, etc etc, I highly recommend you to pay for copyright, which is not the same as cc commons.

    I know you need to pay for it, but I can see you like pictures, you want to protect them ( though publishing them in flickr is not the best way to do so since you directly put them in a public space available for everyone), I really really recommend you to buy copyright.

    In fact, if that’s a personal project, that’s even a better reason to protect it!

  24. Sophia D
    Sophia D December 5, 2012 at 1:46 pm | | Reply

    Thank you for your suggestions! I understand the little privacy on Flickr, but I love Flickr. I was not trying to be rude or anything of that sort when commenting here. I am sorry for any misunderstandings, I just sometimes get nervous over my photo being posted on websites I have no knowledge of. Thank you for taking it down though 🙂

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