Guest Post: How a Chinese Student Found Love in Finland | Speaking of China

21 Responses

  1. Svetlana
    Svetlana March 9, 2017 at 8:27 am | | Reply

    Sweet story, especially for women’s day 🙂

  2. Julie Ni
    Julie Ni March 14, 2017 at 12:11 pm | | Reply

    Reading this gave me such happiness! I truly appreciate that you shared your experience! It is a bit like reading an outline of my memoir (no worries, I don’t intend to write one). Our story is How a Finnish Girl Fell in Love with a Chinese Man in America. Lol. I’m very happy for you two and hope one day we have a chance meeting in an altogether unrelated country! Good news, love birds. Chinese and Finnish make an amazing combination;)

  3. Fred
    Fred March 18, 2017 at 12:58 am | | Reply

    Wow!!!! What a great story. I loved it. All the best to them both.

  4. ManilaMemories
    ManilaMemories March 21, 2017 at 10:00 am | | Reply

    Brings back memories of Helsinki from a few years back….:) I wasn’t there long but I did enjoy my stay! Yet, in reading his story, I wonder how I would have responded if a woman like his GF had openly expressed her feelings to me in that manner early on….Granted, my personality is different from this guy, and I would be more wary of any such overtures….Personally, I would prefer “friendship” for at least several months to any sort of immediate “coupling” and “getting to know” the other person, first, and I’d probably try to do “a lot of research” in Finnish cultural/social traits and I would definitely ask her “plenty of questions” so I know what to expect and whether our personality/character traits can mesh, successfully….

    1. Zhao
      Zhao March 24, 2017 at 5:52 am | | Reply

      yes, you would see lots of behavior are out of typical Chinese logic. The understanding of dating can be different in Finland and China also. When think of the process of our stories, I am also shocked how could those happen. It went fast, and had lots of surprise. But it’s all real. We both have to be brave with something, in breaking lots of stereotypes, overcoming great conflicts from culture, behavior, etc. But I come to get an idea, if both are sincere and love each other, lots of miracles can happen and something seemed impossible in the past have already become reality to me. That’s just life.

    2. Zhao
      Zhao March 24, 2017 at 6:00 am | | Reply

      When she proposed to be girlfriend, I thought the culture can be more understood when we are in a closer relationship, and it would be an exciting experience with lots of challenges, that’s one main idea encouraged me to agree and try. Culture can be gained more from practice.

      1. ManilaMemories
        ManilaMemories March 24, 2017 at 10:27 am | | Reply

        Thanks for sharing your observations, Zhao! I must admit though if I had been around your age and living in a country like Finland for the first time, and a lovely Finnish girl had “proposed to be my GF,” I probably would have “eagerly” accepted….Nowadays, if I were back in Helsinki and the same “offer” came up, I would be “completely shocked!” And I consider myself much more “Westernized” even though I spend a good deal of my childhood in Asia. It would be similar to the “shock” I experienced years ago when I was employed at this company where an elderly “white” guy whom I worked with, secretly pointed out one of our office girls (also “white”) and suggested that I should perhaps go out with her….And this was at a time when I could not even imagine anything like being with a “white” girl or woman in a dating/romantic relationship….For me at least, it was completely unthinkable when I that much younger…..

  5. ManilaMemories
    ManilaMemories March 22, 2017 at 11:42 pm | | Reply

    Thanks, Jocelyn. 🙂 It’s a lovely city and I suppose, if I had chosen to stay there longer, perhaps I could have found “romance.” 🙂

  6. ManilaMemories
    ManilaMemories March 29, 2017 at 2:58 am | | Reply

    Here’s a bit of AMWF trivia which might surprise some people: In 1952, the woman crowned the first Miss Universe was Armi Kuusela from Finland. The following year, she married a Filipino guy, Virgilio Hilario, and they remained together in the Philippines until he passed away in 1975. Yeah, the next time I visit Helsinki, I think I’ll reveal that info to any Finnish friends and see how they react…lol

  7. Julie Collins-Ni
    Julie Collins-Ni March 30, 2017 at 4:40 am | | Reply

    Hey all, Kong and I just discovered that we have a Chinese Finnish bun in the oven. We think a girl! Ajade is her name. Ajade is the best quality jade, but, also, stands for American Jade. My husband created this name in honor of our East meets West amazing marriage. What if it is a boy? Simple. Finn. That is also in honor of our new branch on the 5,000 year old ancestral tree. First Ni baby with Western blood here!! Very happy and excited. Kong, you have given me everything that a woman could dream for in her husband. ????????????

  8. ManilaMemories
    ManilaMemories March 30, 2017 at 7:45 am | | Reply

    Wow, great news! I’m really happy for you both! 😀

  9. Julie Collins-Ni
    Julie Collins-Ni March 30, 2017 at 1:01 pm | | Reply


  10. ManilaMemories
    ManilaMemories March 30, 2017 at 11:36 pm | | Reply

    You know what would be interesting? If Saara could share her views and experiences regarding your relationship!

    1. Zhao
      Zhao June 17, 2017 at 2:41 am | | Reply

      yea! I also hope to see how she understands these also, she just doesn’t have writing habit, lol.. She express herself by drawing comics.

  11. TLAG
    TLAG May 17, 2017 at 3:20 pm | | Reply


    “She proposed we live together, which is very common in Finland but not common in China!”

    Are you sure this is the case! As far as I concern, In the Chinese city is very common that couple move in to live together before marriage.

    1. Zhao
      Zhao June 17, 2017 at 2:39 am | | Reply

      Hi, TLAG, I meant with the traditional idea, Chinese don’t do so commonly or publicly. The young generation nowadays do so, but for example, their parents’ generation generally don’t consider it a good behavior. The people’s general understanding of it creates some pressure to the young people who do so. But in Finland, people accept it very well and take it serious, for example, her parents were very happy that we moved together and they even came to help us move stuff. Normally people have to live together for a period of time before marry. I meant this point.

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