Ask The Yangxifu: When Politics Interfere With Love in China

A girl leaning against a brick wall looking sad and alone
(photo by Cherie Wren)

AK asks:

I am a white 19YO university student living in America, and for one year now I have been in a serious relationship with a PRC national six years older than me. I was already studying Mandarin before I met him and his English is commendable, so communication hasn’t been an issue, and therefore everything between us on a personal level has been ideal. We both feel completely comfortable talking about the future, already assuming we’re working toward marriage after graduation.

However, my parents are none too pleased. They remained generally quiet for the first six months of dating, then all of a sudden began voicing protests. I do my best to ignore their complaints about his age and religion (we’re Christian, he was raised Buddhist), but there is one problem that really puts me between a rock and a hard place.

My father’s job requires him to have a high-level security clearance. Because of this, my parents understandably fear that were I to marry my “Communist” Chinese boyfriend, my father would be forced to quit his job. Even though my boyfriend is not a CCP member, his nationality is all that matters in the clearance. Every time I go home or open an email, I am reminded that I am ruining my family with attacks like:

“Some relationships shouldn’t be allowed to begin in the first place!” Continue reading “Ask The Yangxifu: When Politics Interfere With Love in China”

Ask the Yangxifu: Can Western Women Love a Communist Chinese Military Man?

People's Liberation Army soldiers in Shanghai
Can Western women fall in love with Chinese men who are Communist Party members, and in the military?

Concerned Chinese Person asks:

I’m a Chinese service man,and I’m a number of the communist party of China,I have a question about it,My identity isn’t like the ordinary people,if I build a serious relationship with a western girl,would she mind of my identity?


CCP, chances are, she wouldn’t care if you’re a Communist or in the military.

Sure, back in the era of McCarthyism, consorting with Communists could suddenly make you “un-American” and put you on the fast track to unemployment.

Even today, some extremists throw around the label “Communism” as if it’s a four-letter word, and “fear government takeover.” But, by and large, these people wouldn’t even think of coming to China, studying Chinese, or having anything to do with a country that has a red flag with a hammer and a sickle on it.

That means, the Western women you’d end up meeting in China probably don’t see Communism as a big deal anymore. Continue reading “Ask the Yangxifu: Can Western Women Love a Communist Chinese Military Man?”