Guest Post: Odd Questions I've Heard About My Interracial Love | Speaking of China

18 Responses

  1. Eileen Huang 黃愛玲
    Eileen Huang 黃愛玲 February 23, 2017 at 10:36 am | | Reply

    Exactly. I had my husband’s former Taiwanese colleague asked me if I like Asian men. I simply replied, “I like men.” He nodded and understood.

    1. Cat
      Cat February 24, 2017 at 7:18 am | | Reply

      Haha that’s the perfect answer!

      1. ManilaMemories
        ManilaMemories March 23, 2017 at 12:17 am | | Reply

        Love that answer, as well….But then again, I would never dream of asking any woman whether they “like” Asian guys….And most of the non-Asian women I am aware of who are “open” to having a relationship with an Asian man are usually immersed in some aspect of the culture….

  2. Andy Chen
    Andy Chen February 24, 2017 at 3:03 am | | Reply

    Eileen, that comment reminds me of the time I was asked by a group of Taiwanese women the question, “Who is the most beautiful, American women or Taiwanese women?” I truthfully answered “women are beautiful all over the world”. They were not pleased, since I think I was supposed to say Taiwanese women, but at the time I wasn’t flirty enough to realize that.

  3. Eileen Huang 黃愛玲
    Eileen Huang 黃愛玲 February 24, 2017 at 4:09 am | | Reply

    Andy –
    People are something else. 😂😂😂

  4. Marino
    Marino February 24, 2017 at 8:22 am | | Reply

    No one uses the term ‘interracial’ any more. Can you imagine describing a courtship or marriage between Caucasian and black as ‘interracial?’ You’d be PC’d out of town.
    A relationship between a Caucasian person and a Chinese person or a Jewish person is a relationship, pure and simple.

    1. Marta
      Marta February 24, 2017 at 6:43 pm | | Reply

      That’s interesting. Look up the movie Loving, about a marriage between a white man and a black woman in the 50s (the movie is from last year). Absolutely every info website, review, piece of news, etc, includes the word interracial to describe it. Just sayin’.

    2. Cat
      Cat February 24, 2017 at 8:49 pm | | Reply

      On the one hand I agree – relationships are just relationships no matter what race the people are. Ideally “interracial” relationships wouldn’t be seen as any different to any other relationship.

      On the other hand, I agree with Jocelyn – the reality is that people in interracial relationships do have different experiences.

      At the risk of opening up another can of worms – I think it’s a bit like saying marriage equality isn’t a thing. It shouldn’t be, it should just seen like any other marriage but the reality is that it isn’t.

  5. Marta
    Marta February 24, 2017 at 6:47 pm | | Reply

    Hi Chi! Good post 🙂 I have never been asked that kind of questions (yet) but if someone does I will reply like Eileen did: I like men!

    In my case, given that I’ve been living in China for years, I think it is only natural that I ended up with a Chinese man. I mean, statistically it makes sense, right? It would have been weirder if I lived in China and only dated foreign men 😀

    1. Cat
      Cat February 24, 2017 at 8:42 pm | | Reply

      Thanks for your comment Marta 😀 I agree it seems only natural if you’ve lived in China for years that you’d end up marrying a Chinese man, I imagine there would be some people who would still only date/marry within their race no matter where they lived though.

  6. MK
    MK February 27, 2017 at 7:53 am | | Reply

    The stats aren’t correct. Asian women marry out 37% of the time in the US.

    Asian men marry out 16% of the time. Asian women are the ONLY group that marry out to such a large extent.

    http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/06/12/interracial-marriage-who-is-marrying-out/

    Oddly enough many Asian women go for white supremacists Richard Spencer for instance only goes after Asian women.

    200 years of brain washing and dehumanising Asian men has these sort of effects.

  7. Britany
    Britany February 27, 2017 at 7:15 pm | | Reply

    Chi! What a wonderful post^_^ It’s so true it’s not the race of the person but who they are! As a fellow Aussie married to a Chinese man I’ve often been asked if I’m only attracted to Asians. People seem intent on finding some explanation or cause and affect relationship as to why I married a Chinese man. Rather than assuming that people who are in an interracial romance are just like any other couple in love, people tend to be stunted at the differing racial backgrounds. Curious questions are fine but when people seem fixated on your partner’s race it can get extremely frustrating, especially when they overgeneralize countries, cultures and peoples under one banner of “Asian-ness”.

    1. ManilaMemories
      ManilaMemories March 22, 2017 at 11:06 pm | | Reply

      Indeed, Britany, as an “Asian-American” male, I completely agree, but I think that’s one of the problems associated with the AMWF scene and other such social phenomena, which is why, outside of occasionally reading these blogs and looking at pics, I tend to shun anything remotely related to these so-called “movements.” Oddly enough, I believe that the more we emphasis the “uniqueness” of such relationships on social media, the more it refocuses on the “racial” aspect….

  8. D-Maybe
    D-Maybe March 6, 2017 at 7:30 pm | | Reply

    How did your parents come up with the name “Chi” for you? Does it have a particular meaning?

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