Chinese Women We Admire & How Our Husbands Show The Love — Pub’d on WWAM Bam

Because I’m recovering from the flu, I thought I’d remind you to read a few great group posts at the group blog WWAM Bam (Western Women & Asian Men, Breaking All Molds) that happen to include contributions from me.

For International Women’s Day: Chinese Women We Admire, you might be surprised to learn that I chose my mother-in-law:

One of the smartest women I’ve ever met pretty much never went to school, worked in a factory for years, and doesn’t shy away from even the toughest jobs around the house and the neighborhood. She can also carry enormous piles of sweet potatoes balanced off of a bamboo rod, knows where to forage for the tastiest wild ferns in the mountains, and cooks some of the most delicious food I’ve ever had in China. Meet my mother-in-law.

I never expected to forge a close relationship with a woman like her, whose life feels as distant from my own as the thousands of miles that lay between her hometown and mine back in Cleveland, Ohio, USA. Yet we’ve bonded in so many ways, especially through our mutual love of cooking great food. I also admire her indomitable spirit. She has survived many hardships in her lifetime and yet faces life with a courageous optimism. This has inspired both me and my husband during our own trials and tribulations. Mother-in-law, thank you for being there for us!

You can read the full post at WWAM Bam.

Also, in How 5 Chinese men show love to their Western women, I open up about some of the small, thoughtful things my husband does every day to show he cares:

Every morning, Jun loves to deliver me a steaming hot cup of my favorite dragonwell tea and a bowl of oatmeal. He’ll set it up right next to my bed so I can stay warm under the covers and enjoy a warm breakfast in bed.

I got a cut the other day when I was shaving my legs, and Jun insisted on putting on the bandage himself.

Sometimes, when I fall asleep before him or he wakes up early before me, he’ll tuck the covers around me tightly to make sure I stay warm and cozy.

After I shower, he’s the one who blow dries my hair, sometimes even combing it afterward. The way he looks at me when he finishes, it’s like he’s admiring his own work of art. It totally warms my heart.

Jun has taught me that love can be found in the details, in the quiet moments we share. It’s this kind of love that has kept our marriage strong for over a decade. I love you, Jun.

Again, head on over to WWAM Bam to read the full post.

I’ll be back on Thursday with a fresh post right here on the blog!

4 Awkward Things I’ve Heard in China as a Married Woman With No Kids – Pub’d on WWAM Bam

Today, the group blog WWAM Bam just ran my latest post, 4 Awkward Things I’ve Heard in China as a Married Woman With No Kids. Here’s an excerpt from the article:

In a China where “married with kids” is the unspoken rule, I’m the ultimate oddity – a longtime married woman who has no children. I love my Chinese husband, and I love living in China. But over the years, it has meant getting used to some awkward comments and questions from curious people.

Here are 4 awkward things I’ve heard in China as a married woman with no kids:

#1: “How many children do you have?”

In China, asking if you’re married and have kids is as common as the question “How are you?” in the West. A way to show people care. After all, the assumption for most people in China is, if you’re married you have kids. It’s filial to give birth to the next generation and carry on the family line.

It’s why people are stunned to discover I’m child-free.

Sometimes, people will leapfrog over the question of whether I actually have kids – thinking I’m just like the average married couple in China – to how many I have. Never thinking, of course, that I actually have no kids at all.

Oops.

There’s no avoiding awkwardness here. I invariably have to say something like, “Uh, sorry, I don’t have children.” Sometimes leading to an embarrassing pause in the conversation.

But more often than not, this is followed by another awkward question:

To experience all my awkward moments in their full glory, read the entire article at WWAM Bam. And if you love it, share it!

5 Reasons You Must See Hayden Szeto in “The Edge of Seventeen” – Pub’d on WWAM Bam

The group blog WWAM Bam (Western Women & Asian Men – Breaking All Molds) just published my post titled 5 Reasons You Must See Hayden Szeto in “The Edge of Seventeen”. Here’s an excerpt:

Whenever I think of Hollywood teen movies, I cringe.

It’s bad enough that white actors get all the best roles, with almost no exceptions. But a Hollywood teen movie also gave the world one of the most racist, stereotypical portrayals of Asian men ever – Long Duk Dong in the John Hughes’ movie Sixteen Candles. Talk about one enormous “screw you” to the whole Asian community, including the many talented Asian male actors out there who deserve better roles and representation.

Thank goodness for the new teen movie The Edge of Seventeen, just released in late 2016.

The film features one of the most refreshingly unstereotypical portrayals of an Asian man in a teen movie – the breakout role of Erwin Kim, played by Hayden Szeto.

And surprisingly, The Edge of Seventeen even shares some common ground with, of all movies, Sixteen Candles (Vanity Fair noted “Steinfeld’s character is derivative of Molly Ringwald circa Sixteen Candles”). Who’d have thought?

If you’re hungry for a good teen movie, one with a positive portrayal of an Asian guy, you must see The Edge of Seventeen, featuring Hayden Szeto. Here are 5 reasons why:

To find out those five reasons — and feast your eyes on some cool GIFs at the same time — head on over to WWAM Bam to read the full article.

How to Deal with 3 Major Chinese New Year Annoyances – Pub’d on WWAM Bam

屏幕快照 2017-01-18 下午6.05.14WWAM Bam, the new group blog for Western women who love Asian men, just published my piece titled How to Deal with 3 Major Chinese New Year Annoyances. Here’s the introduction to that article:

As China in January turns into a festive wonderland of red and gold everywhere you look, some of us don’t feel as excited as the Chinese New Year décor might suggest.

The biggest holiday in China is also fraught with a number of annoyances, particularly when you have family there. I know it all too well. There have been some years when I’ve actually dreaded heading home for the holidays.

Fortunately, though, there are ways to manage your way through Chinese New Year, sanity intact! Here are 3 major Chinese New Year annoyances – and how to deal with them:

Read the full piece at WWAM Bam — and if you like it, share it!

Join the New Group Blog for Western Women Who Love Asian Men

%e5%b1%8f%e5%b9%95%e5%bf%ab%e7%85%a7-2017-01-02-%e4%b8%8b%e5%8d%884-11-21We’re starting off 2017 with a bam. Or, more specifically, a WWAM Bam!

WWAM BamWestern Women & Asian Men, Breaking All Molds — is a new group blog for Western women who love Asian men. I’m a part of it, along with a number of writers and bloggers you may already know including Susan Blumberg-Kason (author of Good Chinese Wife),  Laura of Our Chinese Wedding, Becky of BeckyAnces.net, Kimberly of Nama Mama, and Susie of the Daily Susily.

Here’s an excerpt from the About Us page:

We are a group of women from a Western background who are dating or married to men from an Asian culture. AMWF (Asian Male Western Female) couples, or WWAMs (Western Women Asian Men) as we prefer to call them, have in the past been few and far between but in this increasingly globalized world are becoming more common every day. Still, there are cultural differences that such couples will face and our site is here to help you navigate them. At the same time, we make it our mission to weed through the racism and stereotypes about Asian men and culture out there. We all know the truth is never just black and white (or yellow for that matter).

Aside from gripping personal experiences of relationships with Asian men and their families, and of raising AMWF children, this site takes a look at the portrayal of Asian men in Western media and reviews AMWF related productions. We furthermore will spotlight the amazing women out there who have made Asia their family; past and present.

If you are interested in contributing or have any questions, send an email to [email protected]

We’re on the lookout for Western women who love Asian men and writing. You could be a regular contributor or even just a one-time guest poster. If you’d like to be a part of our new group blog, email us at [email protected]

And to my fans here at Speaking of China, yes, I’ll continue to blog here at Speaking of China twice every week.

Wishing everyone a wonderful 2017!